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The Principal's Office

Brittany, aged seventeen, is sitting in a chair behind a desk in an office. She's dressed up in a typical fashion for herself. Her long, manicured fingernails tap against the arm of the chair as she listens to an adult talk to her. It's obvious that she doesn't care about what she did to get herself in this chair or about what the adult is saying to her, likely because she's heard it more than once. While she's being talked to she allows her mind to wander.

The adult, is a high school principal who is looking sternly at the teenager she is lecturing. In her professional attire she looks down her nose at the girl, reading off a report that has been submitted to her about the incident that brought Brittany to her office. It is clear this isn't the first time that the Junior has been in her office. When she scene starts the principal seems to be at the end of her wits with Brittany not paying her any mind.



Brittany looks up boredly as she's asked what she thinks.

What do I think about all this? I think you've got your story completely wrong. Of course you do. I mean, I can't blame you, I suppose, since you weren't there at the scene of the supposed 'incident' but everything you just said was all lies told by that little August. What? April? Oh whatever, it was a month, wasn't it? Anyway, the point is I'm telling you the complete and one hundred percent truth, and I am completely innocent in this case, I couldn't be more innocent if I wore a halo and wings. How so? Okay, let me tell you what really happened then.

So Aug- April, whatever, we were in English class together and she comes up to me and asked me for help. Which was weird because I had no clue what was going on in that class and I haven't talked to her in like, well... ever. So if her unfashionable self was coming to me for help, there was only one kind of help she could need.

Don't look at me like that. Have you taken ten seconds to look at the girl? She's desperately in need of a trip to What Not to Wear and yes I may have told her that. There's no crime in that, she asked for help and I was only giving it. Isn't that what you teach at this school? Unity and helpfulness and whatever else there is on that little banner hanging in the cafeteria.

So why I was at it I might have mentioned her hair being a dry, flat, frizzy mess but anyone with eyes could see that. I mean is it that hard for her to get a hair straightener? Aren't there organizations that donate to the needy? She's definitely needy, okay.

And yes, there may have been some mention of getting a gym membership but she really does need one. It's supposed to be pinch an inch, not pinch a foot. Can we say liposuction much? I didn't know even they made clothes in extra-wide.

And then that crazy girl, who I'm trying to help, just starts crying as I'm sitting there. Like, I'm giving my best advice here and she just brings out the waterworks like we're on Oprah or something.

What? Sobbing hysterically? Are you kidding me?

That's such an over exaggeration there may have been some tears and sniffling but... well, if I was that unfortunate I'd cry too. I just gave her the help that she was after, what's wrong with that? I was doing my good deed of the day, isn't that what you told me last time? Help people and whatever else there was said. Now I'm doing just that and yet you've got me here again. This is kind of ridiculous principal, I'm just being the model citizen that I should be and well -

Principal adds a fact, speaking sternly to Brittany.

She was talking to the person behind me? Oh, well.. hopefully she'll still take my advice, for the sake of the entire school. I mean, looking at that fashion train wreck every single day is going to have negative affects on us all.

What? Detention? Tomorrow. Ugh. I'm leaving.

Brittany rolls eyes, grabs bag and stomps out of room