HE in a Real Life Story challenge - closing wed 6th sept 200

Thank you to Mcfly_42 for the suggestion. 10 points!

Quote :

Write a story where The Hogwarts Experience is a real place. For example, what if the members of H.E were real things? (I say things as some people may not be human for example lilyflower could be a giant Lily that talks)

Total housepoints

1st place: 100 housepoint
2nd place: 80 housepoints
3rd place: 60 housepoints

all who enter: 30 housepoints

good luck and have fun

Here is mine ^^



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The sun had only just risen, but it was already shining brightly in the sky. Little birds were happily twittering on the trees and flying around the Hogwarts Castle in which resided a lovely bunch of people.

Elfie, the Headmistress, was already awake and she was going through huge documents filled with hundreds of sheets of paper. Then, she lifted her head and looked at the clock before deciding it was time to go wake up her husband, Snape. When she found the bed empty, she sighed and rushed to the small zoo they were keeping on the ground of the castle. She burst open the cage of the Hippos and stared down at Snape, taping her foot angrily.

“What did I told you about sleeping with the hippos?” she asked.

“But… they were scared of the thunderstorm,” mumbled her husband.

She grabbed him by the ear and dragged him inside the castle.

“No more going out for you, Sir!”

Snape went away to his office, mumbling against Elfie and she sighed before starting her daily tour of the castle. She decided to start with the Gryffindor Common room and when she arrived, it was to see a very confusing scene. Algie was laughing and Amber was kneeling in front of the fireplace, crying.

Elfie, feeling that something was wrong, went to Amber and patted her shoulder.

“Now, what is the matter Amber?” she asked gently.

Amber looked up at Elfie before glaring angrily at Algie.

“She threw my ship in the fire!” she cried before pointing at a small wooden ship on which the name “Harmony” could be read.

“Aww poor dear,” said Elfie before turning to Algie with a stern look on her face. “Meepy, I think you should apologize to Amber here.”

Algie sighed and rolled her eyes.

“Fine…” she mumbled. “Sorry Amber.”

Amber only sniffed and Elfie looked around the room before taking out her wand.

“Accio Romione!” she said, and another wooden ship came into her hands. “Here Meepy, for punishment, you’ll have to give your ship to Amber.”

“But I don’t like Romione!” said Amber indignantly.

Elfie pointed her wand to the ship and muttered another few words. The letters changed and Harmony appeared on the ship. She gave it to Amber who squealed, hugged the ship tightly and ran to her dormitory. Algie blinked and turned to Elfie, looking very sad.

“But that was my ship,” she said sadly.

“Well, you’ll have to think about it next time you burn someone’s ship. And don’t even think about it!” she added as Algie’s eyes fell on Swiftie’s Dramione ship.

Elfie left the Gryffindor Common Room and made her way to the Slytherin one. She pushed the door open and froze in astonishment. Jesse was in the middle of the room, hiding under the couch while Jess and Raistlin seemed to be fighting over him.

“He’s mine!” shrieked Jess.

“No, he’s mine!” answered Raistlin.

“But you’re married to me, you can’t have him!”

“Well I’m cheating on you!”

Deciding it was better not to interrupt them, Elfie closed the door and shook her head before going to the Ravenclaw Common Room, hoping there was at least one house in this school that was sane.

Apparently, it was too much to ask for. Lily was standing in a pot, earth around her feet, and Elly was pouring water on her.

“Elly, for God’s sake, I’ve already told you, I’m not a flower!” said the Head of House, annoyed.

“Yes you are! You’re a lily and you need water, earth and sun to grow!” said Elly cheerfully.

“Elly, Lily is my NAME!”

“Sure it is,” said Elly, not really listening. “Elana, come and help me!” she shouted at the Ravenclaw member who was passing by.

Elana stopped and lifted her eyes from the book she was reading before approaching the two head of houses, looking a bit confused.

“What do you need help for?” she asked, looking at Lily, who was frowning, her arms crossed on her chest.

“We need to take her to the corner of the Common Room where there’s the most sun,” answered Elly happily.

Elfie stood there, unable to move or to speak for a while, and then she came back to her senses and rushed out of the Common Room. There was one house left to visit, and Elfie was dreading it very much. Taking a deep breath, she entered the Hufflepuff Common Room. At first glance, it seemed empty, but Elfie noticed that there were noises coming from the Head of House’s office. She went there and pushed the door slightly open.

Etta was standing in the corner, blocking something, or someone, from the view of another member who Elfie recognized as Rose.

“Come on Etta, I just want to take a look at him!” said Rose plaintively.

“No, he’s my hubby and only me and Marie are allowed to see or feed him!” answered Etta, moving slightly to her right so that Elfie could see David Tennant who was locked in a cage.

Without even doing or saying anything, she went out of the Common Room and made her way to the prof’s lounge. She fell on the nearest chair, exhausted, and turned to Marie, Swiftie and Flissie who seemed to be eating something.

“That smells good, what is it?” asked Elfie.

“Duck. Want some?” said Swiftie cheerfully.

Elfie sprung to her feet and rushed to the table, where she grabbed a piece of duck and hugged it.

“Oh my God Amy, what have they done to you!” she sobbed.

At this moment, the said Amy pushed open the door of the prof’s lounge to find Elfie hugging a roasted piece of duck while Swiftie, Flissie and Marie were looking at each other, both apparently thinking their headmistress was insane.

“What’s the matter,” said Amy, confused.

Elfie dropped the duck leg and rushed to Amy before hugging her.

“Yay ducky you’re alive!” she said happily.

“Sharon, I think you need to rest a little,” said Marie, sounding worried.

Flissie and Swiftie nodded as they both took another bite of the roasted duck. Elfie sighed and let go of Amy who was glad to breathe again.

“I think you’re right,” said Elfie. “I’m gonna go lie down a little.

She went out of the prof’s lounge and as she was walking in the corridor, she went passed a several people; Ginny and WaterLily who seemed to be duelling, Jenn who was holding so many homework and essay that her head was disappearing behind the amount of paper and Stealthy who was running after Analia, asking for his nose to be given back.

Elfie entered her office and went straight to her bedroom, exhausted. After blowing a kiss outside at her dear hippo, she jumped on the bed and fell asleep after what had been a very normal day at the Hogwarts Experience.

(lol i just have 2 say, that was really, really good mc, lol. very creative!)

alrighty lol, here it is...







It was a chilly, cloudy day in the middle of November and most of Diagon Ally, and the other wizarding towns were still asleep, seeing as it was just 7:00 am.

Hogsmeade was still barely asleep. But as the gates leading from Hogwarts to Hogsmeade opened, the quiet atmosphere disappeared.

“Swifty!” You take the first years for their rounds, then bring them straight back to their dormitories!” Elfie directed her trusty deputy headmistress (swifty is deputy headmistress…lol right? Someone told me she was).

Today was a special day, where all the students of Hogwarts would be allowed to visit Hogmeade. Of course, only 3rd years and up could stay all day and wander around on their own, but at least the 1st and 2nd years would have a chance to look around.

Swifty spun around and began directing first years to gather around her. She called over Etta, Lily, WaterLily, and Ginny to help her out. Roman joined them soon afterwards.

“Quiet down please!” Elfie shouted calmly to the rest of the students, who were busy gossiping and talking to each other. “Snape, will you take the second years with….” Elfie quickly glanced around at all of her professors. “…how about, Herby, Stealth, Lisa, Lifey, Ducky, and MarieC.”

Snape rolled his eyes jokingly at the second years.

“Yeah! Slytherin man!” Raistlin yelled.

MarieC took charge, calming the second years down and leading them away.

“Now the rest of you can walk around on your own, but remember to follow the rules!” Elfie instructed.

Like lightning, the students began to dart all differrent ways.

Cheery and Blondie dashed off to check out the new caugdron cake bakery.

Candy and Pansy could be seen skipping, arm in arm, singing “We go together…” while they hurried over to Zonkos.

Somewhere in the large crowd, Amber and Cookie were darting towards Honeydukes to get a good seat.

Elfie caught a glimse of Caroru and skuldandy running to catch up with Candy and Pansy. The future joke shop owners, already ready to do business there.

“Jesse, McFly!” Elfie called to her two Heads. The two older students hurried over. “Make sure you report any behavioral issues to me at the end of the day.” She instructed.

“JESSE YOU BETTER GET OVER HERE!”

Elfie took a step back and Jesse looked for the extremely mad sounding voice.

“Jess! Hey—” Jesse was cut off.

“I can’t believe what you said about Cheery!” Jess screamed.

Elfie rolled her eyes. “Good luck.” She said to McFly, before turning to go find the second years and talk to Snape.

McFly waved to Jesse, who was tiredly glanced at Jess before hurrying to join her friends.

“Come on Slytherin! Let’s here ‘bout that pride!” In the distance, Queeny had already set up a cheerleading pep rally for the Slytherins. Anisa, feather, emeila and blonde all ran to join her, brandishing their Slytherin pom-poms.

Jenn and Cheetahpie began leading the loud “Boo!s” that came from the other houses.

“Hufflepuff we’re smart and stuff!” Jenn began cheering.

“Oh, never mind Jesse, I’ve got to go cheer!” The red anger vanished from Jess’s face. She gave Jesse a quick kiss on the cheek before running off, announced her stance as head cheerleader.

Jesse shrugged and followed Jess.

Meanwhile, in Honeydukes, Yun and Snowy had started a serious game of wizard poker. Amber and Cookie had joined, dragging along Cill and Carou.

Padfoot had just raised the stakes up a few gallons, and Snowy was betting unbelievably high amounts of gallons.

Snape and Elfie entered Honeydukes holding hands.

“Poker? Oh yeah!” Snape ran over to the poker table and pushed Pad off his seat so that he himself would have a seat.

“Snape! Cookie! Amber!” Elfie gasped. “Two prefects and my own husband/professor playing poker!”

Cookie had smartly slid her poker cards into pad’s lap right when snape sat down. Her cards, were now with Pad, so it appeared that she had no cards.

“Professor, I was just telling them all off for starting a game like that.” Cookie said, standing up and pretending to act responsible.

Amber gasped at her. “Well I was just about to agree with Cookie, and end the game myself.”

“JESSE!!!!!!!!!!!”

Everyone turned around.

Jess stood in the doorway, her face redder than the blood of a basilisk, ready to scream. “Where’s Jesse?” She shouted.

“Jess! Please calm down.” Elfie scolded her.

Jess groaned and spun around, leaving the building. Her yells of “I swear…” and “That good-for-nothing…” could be heard from miles away.

“Is she gone?” Jesse whispered, slowly climbing out from under the poker table.

“Jesse?” Elfie looked appalled. “You were involved in this poker game? HEAD BOY????”

Jesse jumped up. “No! I was just hiding from Jess! I just slid under there a few seconds ago.”

Elfie nodded. “Okay, fine. You can go.”

Jesse ran out the door to find a new hiding spot.

“I’ll go help him…” Snowy jumped up. “….hide.” She started towards the door.

“Sit down.” Elfie instructed her sternly.

“Professor?” Cookie asked quietly, still playing the part of her angelic little self.

Elfie turned to her. “Yes?”

“May I please go find LilyFlower? I just remembered some Ancient Runes work I have to ask her about.” Cookie explained.

Elfie knew that Cookie didn’t need to go talk to Lily, but she excused her anyway.

Cookie ran out of Honeydukes and began searching for Jess to find out the latest gossip.

Cookie rolled her eyes. As she rounded the street between Honeydukes and the Minstry of Magic Hogsmeade division office, she saw Jess sitting in someone’s lap on a bench on the sidewalk.

“Jess?” Cookie called out.

Jess looked up from whispering something into someone’s ear.

Cookie rolled her eyes when she saw who Jess was sitting with. It was Jesse.

“You two have made up already?” Cookie laughed.

Jess kissed Jesse on the cheek. “I want to marry him!”

Behind Cookie, Elfie was leading the poker group out of Honeydukes.

The 1st and 2nd years were heading back to Hogwarts.

Slowly, everyone made their way back to school.

And that was just another day at the Hogwarts Experience.

Harry Potter and the Hogwarts Experience

When Harry woke up and his vision cleared he was lying on a large patch of grass. His head was throbbing and he ached all over. Where the heck am I? He thought, starting to panic, the last thing remembered was Voldemort, about to kill him when he apparated and tried to get to Hogwarts, but obviously you can’t apparate into Hogwarts grounds! So where was he?

He looked all around as he stoop up, as he turned to face north he saw a large castle and smiled, he was only a little way from Hogwarts. He started off towards the large castle.
As he got nearer he realised things about Hogwarts were different, the colour of the stone was not grey but a deep purple, instead of a squid in the lake, there was a giant hippo! What the-? He came across the entrance to this strange Hogwarts and there was a sign:

The Hogwarts Experience was Established on Tue 21 Feb 2006

Harry pulled out his wand. This has to be some sort of trick. He thought. As he walked in he gasped, this place wasn’t like any he’d seen, the people here were…were mutants! He saw a cat stroll past with a witches hat on. The cat looked at him suspiciously and ran off in the direction of the door. Harry followed.

The entrance hall was huge, the floor was purple and so was the walls, though the walls were covered with posters of many different things. There were David tenant Posters, Charmed Posters, Sawyer Posters, some weird guys who Harry expected belonged to girls. But what freaked him out most was pictures of him and…and Hermione! Together! He shuddered and turned away from the disgusting site, he then saw pictures of him and Ginny, though this was also creepy, he felt a bit better seeing her face. Then next to it was a large picture of his enemy, Draco Malfoy. These things actually like that ferret?

Walking down the hall he saw someone he knew! He never felt so relieved in his life! He made towards the flaming red hair,

“Ginny!” He called, “Ginny, what the hell is going on here? I’m totally confused!” Ginny turned round and her mouth fell open,

“Oh my god! It’s you! I have to tell Cheery!”

“Ginny? It’s me Harry! Come on, what’s going on here?” Ginny laughed,

“How cute! You think I’m the real Ginny!”

“You’re not Ginny Weasley?”
“Nope,”

“Then who are you?”

“I’m Just Ginny,”

“Woah, Woah, Woah, hold on, you just said you weren’t Ginny?”

“Yeh, I’m not Ginny, I’m Just Ginny.” Harry looked at the girl, she looked exactly like Ginny, the hair, the eyes, but she was claiming she wasn’t Ginny. He decided to turn and run. But in doing this he ran into something big and fluffy, he bounced off this fluffy thing and got knocked against the wall. Harry looked up and saw a giant duck!

“Ginny, why is Harry Potter in our castle? You didn’t kidnap him did you?”

“No duck, I found him here,” The impostor Ginny giggled, “He thought I was the real Ginny!”

“Ok, now there’s a giant talking duck, maybe Voldemort killed me and I’m in hell!”

“Oh no, you aren’t in hell, and Voldemort defiantly hasn’t killed you.”

“Then where am I…” He trailed off what he was saying as a turtle flew passed, “Did I just see a flying turtle,” A llama then ran after the turtle, but skidded to a stop in front of him,

“mcfly, come back here! It’s Harry Potter!” The llama called,

“Harry Potter?” It said, “Oh my god it is as well!”

“Shouldn’t you all be doing Homework?” A kind voice shouted down the Hall, Harry looked through the gap in the now formed semi-circle around him that the person…no thing that called was a giant white lily!

“But LilyFlower, it’s Harry Potter!” The llama called,

“I don’t care what excuse you’ve got elana, we all have to do home- ok, she was telling the truth!” The turtle and Ginny impostor giggled at Harry’s reaction to the large talking Lily.

“What’s going on here?” The group encircling Harry all turned and shouted,

“ELFIE!”

“Well, Harry Potter seems to have stumbled upon our school,” The yellow Duck said. The circle parted to let in this Elfie person and Harry gasped. There in front of him was a small female elf, but it had a long silver beard that resembled Dumbledore’s,

“Hello, my names elfie dumbledore, nice of you to pop into a lovely school,”

“This place is a school! All I wanted was to apparate into Hogwarts but-”

“You can’t apparate in and out of Hogwarts grounds,” Came a familiar, unkind voice,

“Snape! Get away from me!” He reached for his wand but it was gone, “Hey where’s my wand?” Turning round he saw another strange thing had joined the group, it was a man, but he was wearing a tunic and sandals and was holding Harry’s wand,

“Looking for this?”

“Yes!”

“Good thinking Roman, we don’t want anyone hurt now do we?” The strange Elf thing said.

Every one of the weird freaks started talking at once, Harry’s head started spinning and then he snapped!

“STOP!” He yelled, everyone went silent, “Look, I just want to get back to Hogwarts! I just want to get out of this place! And I just want to get away from you MUTANTS! I mean talking flying turtle, that’s just too weird!”

“Fine then,” The turtle said, it came close to Harry’s face and slapped him over the head with its arm, the Llama then turned to Harry and spat,

“Sorry, it’s a habit of llamas,” then it galloped off, following the turtle.

“And, where do giant ducks come from, and why would someone want to impost Ginny? And who would want to be snape? And why would a female elf want a long silver beard? And Why would a man dress in a tunic in this time? AND WHY IS THERE A GIANT LILY!!!” One by one the freaks went away, Harry had obviously hurt their feelings, “And one more thing. Why are there pictures of me with Hermione!”

* * *

Harry woke up sweating, his heart beat in his chest, he reached for his glasses and put them on. It was all a dream he thought Just a dream as his vision became focused he realised he was in some sort of hospital, with a giant duck, a bearded female elf and a girl who was jogging on the spot, he then realised it wasn’t a dream, it was real!

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

(((
om..g PILLER OMG hahaha that was hilariiouse lol and I cant stop laughing it was so funny hahaha I mean omg.. that was soo funny lol am I really that bad! lol &goes to write hers*)))

(Oh my god, these are sooooooooooo good!!! I can't wait to write mine! Elly *laughs* THE ZOO MADE IT!!! Horray! I can't believe I spat in Harry Potter's face....that is perfect! And Harry being against Harmione is so awesome! *zooms off to write hers*)

The Sun was shining into the Slytherin girl’s dorm on this early November morning. Although the Slytherins lived in the dungeons and way beneath the ground... they had charmed windows in each dorm. This Window just happened to be placed by Jessica Riddel's bedside along with her favorite alarm clock that talked to her and had many characteristics. The Alarm clock went off in a timely fashion. “JESSSSSSS” the Alarm clock, Skully, screeched! “WAKE UP JESS ITS SEVEN AM ON YOUR BIRTHDAY UP UP EVERYBODY UP!” The girls in the dorm awoke angrily.

“Jess turn her off!” yelled Jessica Riddel’s best Slytherin friend Pansy (or as Jess liked to call her Tay)

Jessica yawned and touched the off button on her Skully alarm. “Sorry guys!” She said squinting from the cascade of light streaming on her from the window.

“Happy Birthday Jess!” Queeny –also known as peaches-said.

“Ugh not so happy. Jesses got me doing quidditch practice. Then we have the Cheerleading try outs.” Jessica Paused and glared at the girl in the fifth bed down, pillow, her co-captain of the Slytherin Cheerleaders who had set up the try outs. “And then Jesse said he can’t even have dinner with me because of some thing he has to do with the new band.”

“Oh dark lord save us Jess is complaining again!” Yelled out Tay.

“Oh shush!” Jess snapped back and threw a pillow at her BFF.

“I looove you I looooved you all along and I forgive you” Music started playing and Jess grabbed for her phone.


“What’s up?” she answered.

“You finally!” Jesses distressed voice said back, “Get down here so we can go to the quidditch pitch before practice!”

“Omg Jesse I just woke up hold on!” she grumbled, “Here talk to Taylor while I go to the bathroom and get dressed.”

Jess walked towards the bathroom hearing “hi daddy!” coming out of Taylor’s mouth before she shut the door and rolled her eyes. She went through her outfits magically making putting them on and then taking them off. It was the weekend and there was no need for uniforms thank goodness. She settled her mind when she put on her white dress and a small green cover up. She slid on her green strappy heals and applied a little eye liner before walking back into the room.

“But daddy James broke up with me!” Georgia who now had the phone said, “oh wait here's Jess!” she said handing the phone to Jess.

“Hey where are you Ill be right down!” She said happily.

“I’m in the common room with Rai! Hurry” Jess snapped her phone shut in anger.

“You know I think I should go really slowly just to make him mad. I mean he didn’t even say Happy Birthday!” she said and watched a few of the girls roll there eyes at her. She laughed and walked out the door then took almost a minute going down each step. She saw Jesse sitting with Racey/Rai on the couch.

“Hey guys!” she said as she reached the bottom stair.

“Hey baby!” Jesse walked over and hugged her. “Happy Birthday!”

Jess immediately felt bad for trying to make him mad. “Thanks! Sorry it took me so long to get down my heal broke off and I couldn’t remember the spell to fix it.” She lied.

“Ooh nice shoes!” Racey said coming up and hugging her. “Happy birthday Hun!”

She put an arm around racey's neck and an arm around Jesses. “Thanks to both of you but lets get going!”

They walked down to breakfast and sat together at the Slytherin table. Jess glanced up at the Professors table and saw her headmistress who was a smart little elf named willow eating away with her husband snapey.

Jess looked over at Racey. “So guess who’s coming for my birthday dinner!”

“Who???” Racey said excitedly.

“Draco Malfoy!” I Owled him and he said he was going to sneak out of Hogwarts with Blaise and meet me and whoever else wants to come at the new Unicorn palace restaurant in hogsmead.

“Oh I want to come!” Racey said. “Draco's hot!”

“Omg I know and so is Blaise!” Jess said happily.

Jesse put an arm around her and she looked over at him..”Um but you’re the hottest of them all!” she said smiling.

“Hah I’m so sorry I can’t come sweetie just the band needs me and Ill make tomorrow a me and you day. Ill ignore everyone else for you.”

“Aww you don’t have to do that it’s no big deal!” She smiled and kissed him.

A loud wolf whistle came from the door of the great hall where Adam stood.

“Oh god no!” Jess hid her face as she saw him walking over.

“Hey you two love birdies!” Adam said sitting down across from Jess, Jesse, and Racey. “How are my two gods?”

Jess rolled her eyes and stood up pulling Jesse and Racey with her. “So sorry Adam we have to go get ready for the quidditch practice.” She rushed out of the great hall pulling the two bys behind her.

“Oh thank god I can not sit through another breakfast of him asking when my next show is!” Jess grumbled walking out the door and towards the Quidditch pitch with the boys.

And so the day went. The practice ran smoothly. Jesse only yelled a hundred times compared to his last practice where he screamed 348 times.

Jess stepped out of the Quidditch room showers and put on her cheer uniform then headed back out to the quidditch pitch were she saw Pillow waiting for her.

“Hey Piller!” She said smiling and waving her pom poms.

“Hey Jess how was quidditch?” She asked magicking up two chairs a table and two clip boards for the try outs.

“Great Jesse took his shirt off and all the girls were oogling him and then at the end of practice the girls were all still in the stands and I walked over to him and was like ‘great practice baby’ and he kissed me and Omg you should have seen there faces pillow they were so jealous!”

“Haha nice” she said sitting down in one of the chairs.

Jess sat down and looked at her clip board. “All these Slytherins are trying out!” she gasped.

And Try outs resided. Jess slowly became tired of watching the girls do in some cases horrible cheers. Racey tried out and made the team but the best try out would have had to be Taylor’s…

“Ahh Tay nice to see you trying out! Go ahead and start your cheer!”

“Ok” she giggled then “I SAID brr its cold in here I said there must be some Slytherins in the atmosphere-“ but Jess cut her off.

“Tay can you yell- like Awesome oh wow you like total freak me out I mean right on Slytherins sure are number one!” Jess pillow and Taylor all cracked up.


The day went on and Jessica was exhausted by the time for her birthday dinner. She didn’t even change out of her Cheer uniform and instead just walked through hogsmead showing off her Slytherin pride. She walked into the unicorn and screamed. Because the place was packed with Hogwarts Experience students who all yelled “SURPRISE” as soon as they saw her.

Jesse walked up and hugged her. “Happy birthday love” he said and then moved out of the way so the hordes of people could hug her.


At the end of the night she had talked to everyone, Racey, Jesse, Elfie, Etta, Flissy, Marie, Amy, Snape, Mikey, Candy, Her mother Lily, Her father Roman, Caroru, Ginny, Lisa, Taylor, Elana, Annie, and many many more people. As she went through huggeling all the people that had come to wish her a happy birthday she realized that if she didn’t have these people her life would be void of fun. There was nothing anyone could do that could tear these friends apart. Yeah some may leave the HE. But no one will ever be forgotten… We will all have a spot for our school in our hearts and our memories of each other will always go on.

She fell asleep happily that night knowing this would be her favorite birthday of all and when she slept she dreamed of a magic marker named ashes running around with Ron Weasley.

The boat cut through the dark waters and sent a ripple expanding into the darkness. Groups of nervous and terrified students sat together in silence. A tall dark figure in a black cloak stood at the front of the boat. At first glance, his hand was on his cheek as thought in absorbed thought. With a pained look on his face, his hand creped up to his ear to block out a noise. As Snape continued rowing with his wand, an incessant chatter persisted by his ear.

“So then when I received the letter to join Hogwarts Experience I was ecstatic! But that was because I thought it was the real Hogwarts like in the books. But then I figured, ah well, I’m already 17, I’m not going to get to join the real Hogwarts. I’m way too old for that. Although nowhere near you hey old man?” Brittany Mcgraf, a new member, said with a laughing nudge in Snape’s side making him grimace. “So how old are you? Are those wrinkles I see? I have the perfect lotion for you. My mum bought it for me. My mum buys me loads of stuff you know. Where on earth did you get that black cloak? It’s just hideous! Quite loner, hermit kinda thing don’t you think? Surely not in style now. Maybe someday I could give you a makeover? I’m free tomorrow! How about we just meet-”

Snape’s fingers inched toward the potion he had in his pocket. “Wretched kids, if only I could give them a little potion-” As he pulled the glowing yellow potion in his pocket, an image of Elfie came into mind.

“I’m warning you Snape! No more poisoning the first years! You can’t keep poisoning whoever you want!” Elfie exclaimed with her hands on her hip. “Now I’m trusting you with escorting these students safely! I don’t know what I saw in you! My mother told me to marry one of her distant hippo cousins. But did I listen? Noooo, I had to marry a human!”

“…so then my mother says of course you’re the most beautiful daughter, which of course I am. Then David, darling David was nearly in tears when I told him I had to go. But we do what we must. Besides I think that…”

Snape slipped the potion back into his pocket and pulled out his wand. Elfie forbid him poisoning the students but she didn’t say anything about hexing them. With a quick flick, Brittany’s mouth shut closed with a loud snap. He whistled happily as he watched her struggle to open her mouth.

“Erm Mr. Snape?”

Snape turned around to see a little nervous girl raising her hand. “Yes?”

“Why isn’t Hagrid bringing us to the castle? Isn’t he the gameskeeper?” Molly timidly asked.

“That is but we haven’t had a Hagrid join the site yet.” Snape turned around with a swish of his cloak. “So I got this job.”

“But that isn’t how it…oh my god. Is that a giant purple hippo?” She exclaimed as her eyes widened at the sight of a large grinning purple hippo castle with purple swirls dancing in the air.

Snape grimaced again. “And that is our beloved school. This is the last time I agree to have Elfie redecorate the castle.” He muttered under his breath. He ushered the new students into the Great Hall. The Great hall was empty except for 4 large tables. He instructed them to stay put as he went to find out where everybody else went.

Curious about the castle, Molly slowly followed him up the stairs. Her eyes widened at the large portrait of the most bizarre family tree she’s ever seen, with so many lines and arrows it looked more like a puzzle then anything else.

She approached a classroom called the Debate Room and peeked inside.

“So of course Hermione and Draco are perfect for each other.” Fated announced with a wide glittering smile. He picked up a mirror and started admiring himself for a few moments. “They are the ultimate couple. How could Hermione resist him? He’s devilishly handsome, clever, and a humble Slytherin. Not to mention a proud Death Eater. We’re a lot alike in many ways.” He winked at the audience before continuing.

A girl in the front yawned a bit before continuing to do her nails. “Fated, you don’t have to wink.” Queenbee stated as she adjusted the crown on her head. “It’s just me here. Your charms, whatever little you have, won’t work on me.”

Fated grinned again. “Just give it time, I can feel you trying to resist me.” With a loud yawn, he turned into a shark with butterfly wings and flew out of the room.

Molly continued on down the hall and stopped at another classroom. This one was labeled Games Galore. As she peeked inside, she was astonished to see tables scattered everywhere, with a very dusty, tired girl glued to the floor. She stopped a student in the hallway.

“What is wrong with that girl? Is she sick? Why is she glued there?” she asked with concern.

The red head glanced inside and smiled. “Her? No that’s just Amberg. She plays games so much, she decided to glue herself there in case someone would come in and play with her.” Ginny glanced at the little girl fondly. “Are you new? Let me give you a tour of the castle. This is the Professor Lounge, you can’t go in but you could peek through the window. That’s our headmistress right there.”

As Molly peeked in, her eyes widened at the sight of a young woman in a purple hippo printed dress talking to a large duck. At first glance, they seemed to be talking to the wind. She looked inquiry at Ginny.

“That wind? That’s Running Swift. She actually runs around so fast, nobody really knows what she looks like.” Ginny said matter of factly.

“Let’s place riddles in the sorting hats!” Duck said with a devilish smile. “There’s thousands of those! They’ll NEVER find those! And we could watch them suffer!”

Elfie nodded and laughed as she tucked a strand of hair behind her pointy elfin ears.

Ginny groaned and motioned Molly along. They continued on and stopped at the Hufflepuff House. “This is my house. Come on! Just a quick look though if you want to see everything.” Ginny said with a grin. They entered to see a large commonroom with pillows about like a sleepover. MarieC was playing with her Remus and Tonks dolls. Etta and Flisan were dancing around in their badger costumes, although Etta was also wearing a black cloak. And in the corner, Jen was holding out a whip in one hand, and several books in another. Several other students were backing away from her, including Cheetahpie, Eirbear, and Cookiemonster.

“Have you all done your homeworks yet? Essays are due by the end of this month people!!! And go work on your riddles! And study study STUDY!” Jen yelled as she threw books at them. Suddenly spotting Ginny and the new student, she hid the whip behind her back. “Er, hi are you new?” Jen said with a bright smile as she muttered at Ginny. “Why didn’t you tell me we had company? That’s how we scared the last first years.”

“We hope you’re in Hufflepuff. We’re a lot of fun!” MarieC called out as she held up her dolls.

Glancing at Jen’s whip, Molly nodded and forced a smile. “Maybe we should continue with the tour.” Waving to everyone, she nearly ran out of the room.

“Don’t mind her, Jen’s kinda….so anyway here is the Ravenclaw house.” Ginny said with a wave of her hand. Molly peeked inside and let out a sigh of relief. At least this house seemed fairly normal. Suddenly two flowers hopped out into the room as they argued.

“I’m the Lily on the site! You can’t just be the other Lily!” Lilyflower stated as she dusted off her petals surrounding her face.

“You are the Lily! I’m the WaterLily! You know the ones that live in the water?” WaterLily said with exasperation in her voice.

“A Lily is still a Lily.” Lilyflower stated with a pout. “Roman! You tell her!”

Roman was covered with library essays and mumbled, “A Lily is still a Lily, WaterLily.”

“See?” Lilyflower said with triumph on her face.

WaterLily let out a sigh and pulled out her wand. “Okay, okay but I’m not changing my name. And don’t even try to make me. I’m the top three duelers at Hogwarts and don’t make me show it.” She threatened

Lilyflower also pulled out her wand. “You’re just in that spot because I let you.” She said with a smirk. “I’d like to see you try to beat me.” As they started dueling, a crowd gathered to watch. Elana (a girl who resembled a llama) and skuldandy started to gather bids from the crowd. Elly walked into the commonroom and stared in horror.

“No! This is illegal dueling between professors! Someone could get hurt! And you’re all taking bets??? Elfie will go crazy! Why I’m going to-” Elly huffed as her face grew red.

“But Elly,” skuldandy interrupted Elly’s tirade. “The bidding pot’s up to 100 galleons!”

Elly looked at skuldandy and started to search her pockets. “Put me down for 10 on Lilyflower. What Elfie doesn’t know won’t hurt her.” And she closed the portrait door with a wave of her wand.

“Well, I suppose we don’t need to visit the Gryffindor house as most of their members are watching in there.” Ginny said with a grin. “Last stop, Slytherin house!”

As they approached the Slytherin house, they soon found out it was locked. Luckily, Ginny knew a secret passageway into the commonroom. When they entered, the entireroom was filled with black cloaked figures in a large circle. Black candles flicked on the walls.

“The Death Eaters meeting will now commence.” Fated announced with a gleam in his eye. He then spotted Queenbee in the corner trying to blend in. “Sorry Queen, only members that did homework and essays are allowed to attend.”

“I’ve done mines plus extra! And I’ve finished the first Task. It was easy.” Raistlin boasted with a grin.

“Great going! With the rate, we’re going we’ll be the best house ever! Not that there was any doubt of course.” Fated announced with everyone cheering. “Now lets go down to the feast so we could keep up our strength for Quidditch!”

Jess and Pillow lead the cheerleading team to hype the crowd up some more. The did headstands and splits. Snape followed the crowd and grinned in pride. His grin soon faded as he spotted Elfie walking toward him with death in her eyes. Behind her was a grinning Brittany McGraf, the student he hexed.

“Snape, do you have something to say to me?” Elfie demanded with her wand outstretched.

“Well, yeah…she…I…hand slipped…meant to…accident….I’m sorry Elfie.” Snape mumbled, ashamed to be yelled at in front of so many students. He glanced again at her wand. “But Elfie, don’t be rash. We are married.”

“I’ve already decided on what your punishment should be.” Elfie announced with a gleam in her eye. She reached behind her and pushed Brittany toward Snape. “Say hello to your new Slytherin house member.” Snape let out a loud groan.

Brittany grinned angelically. “So when should we schedule that makeover of yours?”

Enjoy! It's- er- a bit long, so it won't let me post the entire thing at once. That's the reason for the double post! There was never anything about word count, so please don't mark it down for that!

~*~*~

Elana woke to the soft sweet sound of birds chirping outside her open window on a lovely Saturday morning. She smiled, eyes slowly opening. <i>There go Lifey, Shawn and Marie. Right on time,</i> she thought after a glance at the clock on her bedside table. She sat up in her four-poster, yawned, stretched and swung her legs off to one side of the bed, grabbing her glasses. Elana put them on, stood up and walked over to the open window and stuck her head outside, curly brown hair messed every which way.

“Morning Lifey, morning Marie, and good morning Shawn,” she called brightly, big green eyes looking up at her friends. Shawn, as usual being the hawk that he was on the inside, was perched in the most precarious spot at the tip of the Tower. They smiled down at her, waving, then went back to their song. Yes, her friends were human, but the bird inside of them always came out in the morning and evening especially. Elana herself was a llama on the inside, which was inconvenient sometimes, seeing that if she got agitated, she would spit in the face of whoever was making her that way and quickly turn tail and ‘gallop’ off.

She pulled her head back inside and glanced over at the beds in the dorm. Naturally her and Lifey’s were empty, but Elly’s was still occupied. <i>Of course, the turtle is the last to wake,</i> she thought, shaking her head and smiling. Deciding to let Elly rest, Elana went into the bathroom, showered and got ready for the day.

Half an hour later when she was ready, Lifey had come inside and Elly had decided to open her eyes and was sitting up in bed.

“Morning sleepyhead,” Elana said brightly, walking over to Elly and ruffling her hair.

Elly groaned and got up, batting Elana’s hand away then shakily headed over to the bathroom. Elana smiled and sat on her four-poster, gathering Ron/Hermione posters and everything else she had related towards Romione into a bag. The last to go in was her treasured wonderful and amazing shiny golden orb of pure Romione goodness. There would be the first of many Romione Club meetings later that morning and she wanted to be prepared.

Suddenly, she sat up straight as if a ruler had been shoved down her back. Her eyes widened, whites showing all around her emerald iris. Her face had an otherwise blank expression on it, as she Saw…

<i>A wooden door bursting open-

People, lots of people, angry, so angry, bursting inside-

Running, gasping for breath-

Footfalls, people coming after behind her-

Trees, so many trees, scraping at her flesh-

Silence, a dreadful silence--</i>

She shook her head as she ‘returned.’ <i>Woah, strange….I wonder what it meant.</i>

Yes, sometimes Elana saw the future. After her realization of the llama within, Elana had begun to See. She thought about what she had Seen, still wondering what had- would- happen.

“Ready,” said Elly a bit later as she finished straightening her hair.

“Finally,” replied Lifey. “Let’s go, I’m starved!”

Elana nodded as she came out of her thoughts, and putting the bag over a shoulder followed her friends down the stairs, through the Common Room and into the corridor that led to the Grand Staircase. As they walked down the stairs, they didn’t meet much trouble. Elly, being the fantastic Head Girl that she was, only had to break up one group of angry teenage girls all claiming that they were who Draco was secretly in love with.

“You’ll see!” cried one of the girls passionately, tears streaming down her face and over the bleeding scratches on her flushed cheeks that another had made. “He loves me and I love him! We’ll be together forever!”

A different girl, who seemed to be missing a chunk of her short blonde hair, stuck out her tongue at that while the third, who was bleeding from the lip, pulled her arm back to strike the first girls face.

Elly sighed and with a quick wave of her wand and a muttered incantation the girls were still, anger etched in every feature. Elly put her wand back into her robe and turned to Lifey and Elana. “They’ll unfreeze before lunch, don’t worry.”

Elana and Lifey laughed and continued with Elly to the Great Hall. The girls sat down at the Ravenclaw Table and enjoyed a nice breakfast that was strangely calm for the Hogwarts Experience.

“Look at the Slytherins,” Elly said, nodding her head towards their Table. “Looks like they’re plotting something; see how quiet they are?”

Suddenly, Lifey had a coughing fit, turning bright red. Elana and Elly exchanged worried looks and patted their friend on the back and in a few moments she was back to normal. Lifey smiled apologetically. “Sorry, something in my throat.”

The rest of breakfast passed without incident…well, nearly without incident, this was the Hogwarts Experience after all.

“NO! No more changing your animal! You are what you are and that’s that!” yelled a dark haired Gryffindor, standing up at the Table with her hands on her hips.

“But I don’t want to be extinct! C’mon, a Dodo Bird?! You’ve got to be kidding me!” yelled another Gryffindor.

The first girl, who Elana now recognized as Skully even at this distance, made a strange noise that sounded kind of like a penguin, though Elana really didn’t know what a penguin sounded like.

“Llama and I made the zoo and what we say is FINAL!”

With an angry look on her face, Cheery, the other Gryffindor, stomped off. But, Cheery being cheery didn’t stay angry for long. The Divination professor followed her daughter out of the Hall while levitating a large ‘We Love the Dodos’ sign that bounced in the air above her.

Elana smiled and glanced up at the large tapestry that was hung on a wall behind the Professor’s Table. Their family tree….confusing to look at, yes, but even more confusing to be in. She found herself quickly and looked to see if she had any new siblings. Her parents, the Hogwarts Experience’s resident Death Eater and the Badgeriffic Just Ginny, loved adopting and before she used to have a new sibling nearly once a week, but they had stopped now.

“I’m going to go find Emma,” Elana said after finishing her breakfast. “I’ll see you at the meeting Elly! Bye Lifey.”

Lifey had another coughing fit as Elana left, and Elly patted her back again until she stopped. Elana shook her head, wondering what had gotten into Lifey. She had been so quiet…

Elana walked over to the crowded Gryffindor Table and asked her friend Amber if she had seen Emma yet. Muttering to herself and rocking back and forth, (“I must not play games I must not play games I must not…”) Amber, who was also struggling against the ropes she had tied around herself to prevent her from playing games, didn’t seem able to answer. Elana shrugged and looked down the table for Emma. <i>Aha! There she is!</i> Elana hadn’t seen her before, which was now understandable. Emma had curled up like a kitten under the far end of the Table, meowing and pawing at people’s legs and there was a closet taller than Elana blocking Emma from view. Elana giggled and headed over.

“Hey Drake, can you scoot over a bit?”

The Closet obliged and Elana knelt down and poked her head under the table.

“Emma? You ready for the meeting?”

Emma looked up from the bowl of milk she was lapping up that someone had apparently just set down for her. She licked her hand and smoothed her hair with it then crawled out.

“Of course! My bag was right…Ah, thank you!” she said happily, but cringed as she took her bag from the Closet. A slimy pale and dead looking greenish hand emerged and waved at the girls, well, at least that’s what Elana saw. Elana and Emma shuddered, each seeing their worst fear waving at them cheerfully from the harmless looking closet.

“Let’s go,” Elana frantically whispered to Emma, who nodded in agreement, eyes wide with fear. They sprinted out of the Hall and into the unused classroom they were using for club meetings.

“Phew!” said Emma, leaning against the door she had pushed closed. “I hate it when he comes out of there.”

“Same here,” Elana replied, hands trembling slightly as she opened her bag. Elana pulled out a few posters then realized that she hadn’t brought tape, so used her wand to levitate them and stick them to the walls. Emma put up a lovely banner above the door (RON AND HERMIONE FOREVER), and soon after that the Romione fans started arriving. The wonderful and amazing shiny golden orb of pure Romione goodness was set on the abandoned teacher’s desk for all to see. It glowed peacefully as it always did.

“This is going to be great!” said Elana excitedly, squeezing Emma’s hand. They were standing just inside of the open door to greet their fellow Romione shippers.

“See, I told you it was in here!” cried Elly as she ran into view. “Hey Lannie and Algie! Be there in a moment!”

She disappeared around a corner for a moment, then came back with Ginny, who was dragging a reluctant looking Jesse with them.

Elly walked inside, grinning as she sat down at one of the empty tables and watched the door.

Elana pouted, hands on hips. “Daddy you said you would come!”

“Don’t worry, Peanut, he’ll grin and bear it. Right Jesse?” said Ginny forcefully through her grinning teeth as she gave Jesse’s arm a tug.

“Course!” he said, a huge grin suddenly on his face. “So tell me, where do I sit?”

The pretty redhead smiled, letting go of Jesse’s dark Death Eater robes and passing Emma and Elana to go sit down with Elly. As Jesse walked in, still a bit reluctant, Rose rounded the corner.

“Mum!” cried Rose, gliding to the door as fast as she could. Seeing that Rosie actually was a rose, it was impressive how quickly she could get places.

“Rosie! So glad you could come, dear! I don’t think your sister will be joining us, but come in and have a seat,” Elana said after pulling her daughter in for a hug. Rosie swiftly glided to an empty chair and Elana heard quick footsteps approaching.

“Aha!” cried a familiar voice. “So this is where the meetings will be.”

“Hey Emma, hey Llama!” yelled another familiar voice, and soon the girls were able to see Cookie and Skully coming towards them. Cookie, as always, was moving quickly, carrying a cookie and mooing softly, seeing that she was a moose on the inside. And of course, Cookie being the unique Moosie that she was, moo’d. Skully however, sort of waddled, but that was just the penguin coming out.

The girls smiled as they entered the decorated room, ooh’d and ahh’d at the wonderful and amazing shiny golden orb of pure Romione goodness along with the rest of the small group. As she took a peek inside, Elana noticed Ginny poking Jesse occasionally, reminding him to be good for her Peanut’s sake.

“Here come some more!” Emma said excitedly, bouncing on the balls of her feet. A loud flapping and quacking noise filled the hall a moment later, and Amy, er, ‘flew’ into sight. Of course, she wasn’t really flying, just flapping her arms and quacking convincingly, but hey, she tried. Behind her on all four limbs ran her sister, Becky, who was making loud monkey sounds. The last to arrive were Eirbear and the crowned Prinny, who were seated at the last empty chairs in the smallish classroom.

“This is it!” Emma said, making a mark on the list she was holding. “This is everybody! You ready?”

“As I’ll ever be,” Elana replied, suddenly nervous. “Well, might as well begin!”

“That’s what I like to hear. Now c’mon, they’re waiting for us!”

Elana followed Emma to the front of the room and stood on one side of the wonderful and amazing shiny golden orb of pure Romione goodness while Emma stood on the other.

“Hello and welcome to the Romione Club’s first meeting!” announced Emma happily. There were cheers from the small audience and Elana relaxed a bit. <i>What could possibly go wrong? I mean, it’s just the start of the BEST CLUB IN THE HOGWARTS EXPERIENCE!</i> Cheered at the thought, Elana smiled.

“First things first,” said Elana brightly. “If you don’t know me, I’m Elana: Llama of the H.E., co-president of the Romione Club and also Co-Queen of Romione Land. Which reminds me,” she flicked her wand and a large sheet of paper soared through the air to her open hands. “This is the layout of Romione Land and shows open spaces, the Castle, and everything else. It’s a wonderful place to live, seeing that Emma and I are your Queens, the skies are sunny most days and really, it’s wonderful. I’ll leave this out and after the meeting you can come up to Emma or me and request a place.” She smiled and set the map down on the teacher’s desk. So far everything was running smoothly.

Elana let her mind wander and leaned against the table as Emma, purring softly, explained who she was, the purpose of the club, activities and much much more. Mum was poking Dad again, her eyes never leaving Emma; Daddy’s bright but cool blue eyes darting to look at his watch from time to time, though it seemed he was paying enough attention; Rose and Skully were leaning forward with many other club members, excited to hear what the club would do.

But then suddenly, the door burst open and in ran the Romione shipper’s hated enemy: the Dramionians!

“For Dramione Land!” cried Jess dramatically, Queen of Dramione, from the front of the large group. The Romione shippers looked up, confused and wondering why the meeting had been interrupted.

The Dramionians replied with yells and ran at the Romionians, who stood bravely. You can’t mess with someone’s ship and not expect him or her to give up without a fight, you know.

Realizing the horrible things the Dramionians could do if they got the wonderful and amazing shiny golden orb of pure Romione goodness, Elana grabbed it and shoved it inside of her robes and ran through the fighting crowd, spitting disgustedly at the Dramione shippers. A few of them came after her at a run once they’d realized that someone had escaped. But Elana, using the llama inside her, ‘galloped’ at a fast pace towards the open doors to the castle. Panting and looking over her shoulder, she realized that three angry Dramionians were still after her. She recognized them at once: her daughter, Shae, a running figure covered in snow and Queenie, crown on her head and buzzing angrily.

Elana sprinted outside and into the Forest, not caring to take the path, and ducked behind a tree. She kneeled and peeked out from behind it. The Dramionians weren’t trying to be quiet, so she relaxed a bit. <i>If they come I’ll hear,</i> she thought. With shaking hands, she pulled out the wonderful and amazing orb of Romione goodness. She sighed, leaning against the tree. <i>Well, now I know what that vision was about. I’ll just use the wonderful and amazing shiny golden orb of pure Romione goodness like we do in Divination.</i> She closed her eyes, clearing her mind, not paying attention to the cracking of twigs and the sounds of running feet. Elana opened her eyes, blocking everything out, and gazed into the ball. <i>Show me….</i>

<i>Emma, hissing and clawing at Caree who was fluttering her arms like wings as she tried to escape- Cookie, charging at a large flower- Jesse, leaning against a wall, watching the destruction with a grim smile of triumph on his face- and lastly Lifey and Elly who were dueling. Elana couldn’t make out exactly what else was going on, but neither side was giving in.</i>

Elana sighed, putting the ball back into her robes and put her chin on her knees. <i>This can’t be happening! All we wanted to do is show our support of Ron/Hermione!</i>

The sound of retreating footsteps reached Elana’s attentive ears.

“We’ll get it, don’t worry,” said one of the girls. The others murmured their agreement and soon Elana couldn’t hear them anymore.

Cautiously, Elana got to her feet, swaying unsteadily. She took hold of the tree for balance until she was able to trust her legs again. She peered out, looking between trees to see the castle. The girls had either gone inside or were out there, waiting for her to come out. <i>Well, if they’re going to try and ambush me, let them.</i> She got out her wand, a grim expression on her face, and stepped out of the forest into the light.

~*~*~

OOOHHH A CLIFFIE! Bet you didn't see that coming, eh? And no, as I told Ducky, I'm not adding to it or else it may actually turn into a story with chapters. lol!

You Dramione shippers know I love you, right? I just needed a plot! Forgive me?

“The Hogwarts Experience through Riddles”

The clock rang 6:00 AM. “It’s time”. Raistlin left the bed where he had been meditating with his legs crossed. “The QWT is officially opened. Time to see what Elfie got for us”.

Wearing his long, dark almost black rob and covering his head with the robe’s hood Raistlin left the dorm passing through the Slytherin common room. The people in the room looked at him with a mist of fear and mocking. “Why the hell does he has to wear that?”.

Ignoring them Raistlin left. He was used to that kind of comments and looks. He really didn’t care his misterious side was what make him him. Besides the robe was very useful because it allowed to carry his potions, amulets and other stuff that might be useful. “We never know what could happen, I must be prepared for anything.”

While making his way to the Great Hall he thought of how much he liked the school, if he played his cards right he could learn much and start his plans for world conquering without getting noticed.

On the Great Hall Raistlin entered a door right next to him, The Events Room . Lots of people were already there. “Humpf bunch of chickens”. He saw amberg who miracously wans’t in the games rooms, sweet innocent but should not be underestimated marie and another great enemy ginny. He saw a group of Slytherins and so he ushered towards them. Fated, Severus and Charmed Granger were calmly chatting.

- Hey Raist! You’re late! Said Jesse
- Don’t worry. I didn’t wanted to come right at the beginning, when i know this’d be a confusion. Those Peasants have no manners. Besides there’s no harm in giving him a head start. That’s not what gonna make them win. Said Raistlin in low voice but shapeply threatening.
- Wow you seem confident, and being a little more nice wouldn’t harm you. Charmed Granger seemed distrubed by his presence.
- What are you a bloody Hufflepuff? I’m a Slytherin I don’t have to be nice. So what do we have?
- Riddles – Snape speaked for the first time since his arrival – 40 to be more exact.
- Hum... riddles. Good. I bet some will be in despair soon. What are we waiting? Let’s go. Marie has already dissapeared. Good luck and be careful. Many wish to win this badly! We’re great competition they’ll try get us off!

That said Raistlin went to see what the first riddle was.

- That arrogant little brat. God he drives me crazy but at the same time he’s creepy! I do not wanna mess with him. Said Granger
- And you shouldn’t! He’s more dangerous than you can imagine. Snape warned. I must talk to Elfie about him. I think we should keep and eye on him.
- Ahh he’s not that bad you’re overreacting! Raist is my bro! But I still don’t get the robe thing.

Raistlin looked at the first riddle. It was written in purple ink in a hippo shaped board. After carefully read it Raistlin prepared to leave when someone said “Good luck” he stoped, smirked evily and without even looking back he left the Events Room.

- I must say that was rude! Shouted Amy angrily – Someone should taught that boy the meaning of humbleness. Elfie you should do something about that boy! He’s trouble! Listn to what I say!
- Amy dear! I believe everyone’s good inside!
- You trust people to much! Look what happened to Dumbledore!
- Amy! Snape’s good! I don’t want to discuss this!
- Truth hurts baby!
- Amy don’t push me! You don’t want me to turn you into a non-speaking duck again, do you?
Amy grumbled something .
- What did you say?
- Nothing Headmistress! You’ll see one day the whole school will be mine! Amy spoked in a tone only her could here.

Raistlin was leaving the Great Hall when he run into Jess, who seem to be in a hurry.

- Racey! I forgot the QWT started today. So is it difficult?
- I don’t know why I let you keep calling me that. Any other and I’d turned it into a Pigmy Puff!!!
- Oh Racey, you know you love! But we must work on that clothes... oh wait I see Jesse...bye and good luck! and so she ran to Jesse’s arms.

Raistlin shook his head and walked to the Entrance Hall where he knew the second riddle would be. The riddle was very obvious. Though Raistlin had never been there he knew the riddle could only be in the Hogwarts book of rules room. Raistlin wasn’t very found of rules hence he had never been there before.

Flicking through the pages of the book he found what we wanted. A purple hippo shaped post-it with the second riddle. “Another Hippo! This is starting to be an obssession!”. He took the post-it and another one magically took its place. “Clever” he thought.

He then left the room looking for riddle number 3. “The challenge is unleashed, time for war has began...”.

( okay first off i'd like to say i loved everyone elses :D they were awesome, and i laughed at the way all of you portraied me :D so heres mine with a new spin on me :D)

A day in the real Life H.E.

Elfie, the headmistress of the Hogwarts Experince, woke up and sighed. Today was the annuel Castle inspections, she got ready and quickly grabbed her wand before heading out.

"Might as well go to the common rooms first," she said walking toward the Gryffindor Common Room. She said the password and entered the room. She saw Traci and Algie arguing.
"Romione!" Snapped Algie.

"Harmony!" Traci aruged.

"Romione!"

"Harmony!"

Elfie walked over "What's going on here?" she asked.

"We're trying to decide which name is prettier," Algie said to her.

"Yeah, and Harmony is much prettier!" Traci exclaimed.

"No Romione is!" Algie retorted.

"Harmony," Traci said.

Elfie sighed again, "I think they are both pretty names."

Traci and Algie smiled. Elfie turned around to leave but she heard the start of a new arugement.

"Well Dramione is pretty, too." Traci said.

"Not as pretty as Hinny!" Algie shot back.

Elfie shook her head and continued walking out. She headed towards the Hufflepuff Common Room. Like in the Gryffindor Common Room, there were a couple of people around the fireplace. She saw Jenn and Cookie advance a cheetah like pie.

"What is that?" Elfie asked.

"Cheetahpie's-" Cookie started.

"You turned one of my students into a pie?" Elfie asked. "How am I to keep all of my students happy if one of them is a pie? I don't speak pie....hmmm... note to slef at pienesse to the lanauge class..."

Just then Cheetah walked in. "Guys! What are you doing with my pie?"

Elfie looked at Cheetah then at the pie. "So you aren't a pie?"

Cheetah laughed. "No thats my art homework, you know the project to make something that represents you."

Elfie smiled. "Yes, its always great to see students doing their homework." She turned and set off to the Ravenclaw Common Room, once more there were people around the fireplace. Only this time Elana and Annie were in frount of the fireplace, however there was a giant Lily between them.

Elfie approched them. "Oh, so this is Lily's art homework?"

"No," Elana said. "This is Lily."

Elfie looked between them. "How did this happen?"

Elana looked to Annie. "Tell her Annie,"

Annie smiled. "Well I am Ravenclaw's first Death Eater."

Elfie looked sternly at Annie, before undoing her work.

Lily became a human again and turned to Annie. "10 points from Ravenclaw," she said before leaving.

Elana and Annie went on as if nothing happened. Elfie laughed silently and left, heading off for the final house common room, Slytherin.

Upon Arriving at the Slytherin Common Room she walked in were an argument was taking place, between Jesse and Raistlin.

"I'm more evil," Jesse said.

"No I am!" Raistlin replied.

"I am!"

"I am!"

"No me!"

"Me!"

Elfie looked between them. "For Slytherin's you act alot like Gryffindor's, Only you guys aren't arguing over which name is prettier."

"Of coarse not," Raistlin said.

"We're Slytherins," replied Jesse.

"And Death Eaters," added Raistlin.

"Well I'm a better Death Eater," Jesse said.

"No your not," retored Raistlin.

"Yes I am!"

"No you arent!"

Elfie looked around. "Okay, I've still got to check the General House Common Room." She headed towards the General House Common Room, were you never knew who could be there. Today Amber and Ginny happened to be there. Both of them were dancing, hopping, and skipping around the room.

"Charmed Chica isn't it great to be a 6th year?" Amber asked.

"Why yes it is Flatt-Head," Ginny replied.

"Your a 6th year?" Elfie asked Amber.

"Yup isn't it great?" Amber squeed happily.

"But- but- but- that means i've gotta make you a new badge," Elfie said.

"How come I don't get a badge?" Ginny asked.

"We've been over this, because your a professor," Elfie said.

"Oh well," Shrugged Ginny, as she went back to dancing about the room randomly.

"So Gin, when do you think we'll visit Jessica and Rachel in San Fransico?" Amber asked.

Elfie walked out, and went towards the Professor's lounge. "Atleast my staff is normal," she muttered walking in. However once inside she changed her mind.

The female professors were sitting around oogling David Tennant, while the male professors playied Texas Hold 'Em. She watched as the girls squeed, and the guys put in more money.

"What's going on here?" She asked.

Everyone looked like deer caught in headlights, and before she could get out another word all of them ran. Elfie decided to finally head to the Great Hall so she could have dinner, however fate had other plans. Outside the hall four groups were standing and seperated by houses.

At the frount of the Gryffindor Group were Skully, Cheery, and Caroru. "Gryffindor all the way!" All three yelled.

A merge of booing and cheering came into Elfie's ears. Next the Ravenclaw thrio stepped forward, the trio contained Elly, Sage, ad Lifey.

"Whatever your going down! Ravenclaw for the cup!" They cried in Unison. Once more booing and cheering merged.

Next, a few Hufflepuffs stepped forward, they were Candy, TheOneandOnly, and Eirbear.

"What are you talking about? Hufflepuff's taking you all down!" The 3 screamed. The crowd had once more the same reaction.

Finally the Slytherins stepped up, Pillow, Jess and Cubie
in the frount. "Slytherin will rule!" They yelled over everyone.

Elfie made her way into the middle of the crowd. "You lot know it's dinner, right?" she asked. Everyone ran past her so fast she almost got whiplash. She walked into the Great Hall, were everyone was talking and smiling. "Maybe today wasn't so long," Elfie smiled. "It's just another day at the Hogwarts Experince."

“Marie! Marie! Wait for me!” Swifty called after the redhead, running down the long corridor, a newspaper held in her hand, “You’ll never guess what I’ve just read in The Pensieve!”

“What?” Marie asked, peering curiously at the folded newspaper, “don’t tell me, Etta’s been stalking David Tennant again?”

“Not quite…but it does have something to do with our lovely Doctor,” Swifty replied, before handing the paper to Marie, “here, read it.”

TV’s Doctor Who discovers he’s a wizard at the age of thirty-five

Dishy David Tennant of Doctor Who fame has recently revealed that he is in fact a wizard, and has magical powers that have nothing to do with the planet Gallifrey. In a press conference yesterday, the sexy Scot admitted to discovering his powers during the filming of the new series of the hit TV show. ‘They [the directors] wanted me to do this stunt, where I sort of leap into nothingness. Of course, I had all the safety gear in place, but I hadn’t been attached properly. When I jumped, and realised that something had gone wrong, I sort of…floated to the ground.”
Tennant then goes on to reveal that in the following weeks he was visited by several prominent figures from what he calls the “wizarding world”. ‘So there I was, sitting in the garden, when all of a sudden this giant purple hippo turns up! I’m ready to call the RSPCA, but then it puts on a bowler hat and starts talking. You’ll never guess who it was? Only the Minister of Magic himself.’
So what does this mean for our favourite Time Lord? ‘I’ve accepted an invitation to study magic at The Hogwarts Experience, an exclusive school hidden somewhere in England. I start in September.’
Well we’re sure you’ll have a ‘magical’ time!


Marie looked up at Swifty, her eyes shining. “He’s really coming here?”

“Yessum,” Swifty replied, “I just asked Elfie and she confirmed it. He’s arriving tomorrow!”

“Does Etta know? I’m not sure he’ll be very happy when he finds out the reason half of Geordie-land has seen him naked!”

“Yeah, she knows. Went catatonic when I told her.”

“Sounds about right,” Marie concurred, before linking arms with her friend and strolling towards the Great Hall.

***

“He’s coming here?” Jesse exclaimed from his position at the head of Slytherin table. “That ugly weed?”

“You’re just afraid all the girls will think he’s better looking than you.” Commented Elana as she made her way to the Ravenclaw table.

“Why would I worry about that?” Jesse smirked, “I am after all dueller extraordinaire, chief Death Eater, Head Boy, Second Head of Slytherin, Prefect, soon-to-be Quadwizard champion, not to mention devilishly handsome.”

Marie rolled her eyes as she overheard what Jesse said from her position at the Professor’s table, and turned to talk to Elfie, the headmistress, and Amy, who was wearing a duck costume.

“So when is he arriving?” She asked the little elf, who tucked her hair behind her pointed ears before answering.

“Sometime this afternoon. Snape’s gone to fetch him from the train station.”

“Mind if I volunteer to give him a tour of the castle?” Amy interrupted, with a loud quack.

“Oh,” Marie said, her face falling, “I was hoping I could do that.”

“You can give him the tour together,” Elfie said, stroking her long white beard thoughtfully, “and see if Swifty wants to join you.”

And so, later that day, Marie, Amy and Swifty went to the gates of the purple school to await the arrival of David Tennant.

“I’m cold,” complained Amy, stamping her feet on the ground in an attempt to warm up.

“You’re always cold,” teased Lisa, “but I would’ve thought that duck costume would keep you warm enough.”

“Why do you wear that anyway?” Marie asked, “I’ve always wondered…”

“Well I have to live up to my name, don’t I? People expect me to be a duck…so I have to wear the costume.”

“Riiight…” Lisa said, shooting a worried look at Marie, “well if that was the case then I’d be running around everywhere wouldn’t I? And Elana would have to wear a llama suit and…”

“Elana does have a llama suit,” Amy interrupted, grinning, “she wears it to the Romione Club meetings.”

“Ahh…”

“Look!” Exclaimed Marie, “I think I see them!”

Sure enough, coming towards the gates of the castle were Snape, in his billowing black robes, and a tall, pale, thin man that could be none other than David Tennant.

“Now remember girls,” Marie instructed, “no fainting. I’ve still not managed to wake Etta up yet.”

Amy and Swifty nodded, and looked again towards Snape and David. Moments later, they were standing in front of them, and David was a lot taller than he appeared on screen.

The three girls didn’t say anything at first, simply gazed in wonder at the person they had long admired from afar.

And then, all of a sudden, he spoke.

“Hello there,” his accent was a lilting Scottish, “I’m David.”

“Nnnnnnnnggggggggg.” Was all Swifty could say, and Amy was staring wide eyed at him, so Marie took it upon herself to greet the new student.

“Hello, my name’s Marie, and this is Swifty,” she pointed at her friend, “and Amy.”

“Hello,” he repeated, “I’ve been told by Mick here, or Snape as he tells me he’s known as, that you lovely ladies will be giving me a tour of the school?”

He flashed a smile at the three of them, which didn’t fail to make their knees go weak.

“Err…that’s right Marie said, and pointed up at the school, “after you.”

As David and Snape walked on ahead, Marie frowned at Swifty and Amy.

“Act normally!”

“How can I?” Swifty replied, staring after David, “and you just had to make him walk in front of us, didn’t you, of course, that will help take my mind off things…”

She strode ahead, eyes never straying from the back of David Tennant, with Marie and Amy following, grinning to themselves.

***

“And this is where you go to get sorted,” Amy said, as they passed the Sorting Hat room, “but you can only get sorted on Thursday’s and Sunday’s so you’ll have to wait until tomorrow to find out your house.”

“Okay,” David replied, “which is the best house do you think?”

“Gryffindor!” Swifty and Amy replied, at the same time Marie said “Hufflepuff!”
“I see we have a difference of opinion,” he grinned, “I guess I’ll just have to wait and see.”

“All right, moving on, here’s the Notice Board,” they stopped in front of a large pinboard, chock full of paper, “don’t forget to check here for all the important things that are going to happen around the school.”

“Where do you want to look next?” Swifty asked.

“It might be a good idea to show him the Family Tree…” Marie said, “so he knows exactly what he might be letting himself in for by coming to this school…”

“Good idea,” Amy nodded, “let’s go then.”

They soon came to the family tree room, and went in. There was a huge tapestry displaying the criss-crossing lines of the HE family, and Marie tried her best to explain it.

“Well it all started with Lily, I think…or it may have been Jess…and then somehow I became the Mother of them all and gave birth to some hippos…and then Jesse and Ginny started adopting everyone in sight and that’s when it started to get weird. I’ll warn you now: if either of them ask if you want to be adopted, I strongly advise you say no.”

“Point taken,” David replied, “what’s the next stop?”

“Let’s take a peek at the common rooms,” Swifty said, “starting with Gryffindor.”

They made their way to the Gryffindor common room, and pushed open the door to reveal Skully (who closely resembled a penguin) making a chart with the title “The Hogwarts Zoo”.

“Hey Skully,” Amy smiled, “where is everyone else?”

“Hmm, I think Amby’s in the games room, where else, Becky’s still hunting for the riddles, and WaterLily’s in the garden with LilyFlower. Not sure where all the other Gryffie’s are…”

“Okay, thanks Skully. Shall we go to Hufflepuff next?”

“Good idea,” Marie replied, leaving Skully to her plans.

***

In Hufflepuff common room they found Ginny staring fixedly at photographs of Zac Efron, William Mosely and Daniel Radcliffe.

“Hey Ginny,” Marie began, “this is David Tenn-”

“Shhh Marie! You’re interrupting my gazing time.”

“Sorry,” Marie mumbled, before glancing around the room to find Jenn working on a pile of homework, Candy working on some graphics and Cheetah mumbling to herself in the corner.

All of a sudden, there was an almighty shriek, and a black and white striped shape landed on top of David.

“Etta!” Came a stern voice, “get off of David Tennant!”

The black and white striped shape stood up, and could now be seen as Etta wearing her badger suit.

“But Ginny! I wanted to take him to my room…” Etta moaned.

“There will be no taking of him to your room!” Swifty interrupted, “Now, I’m sorry but we have the rest of the tour to finish, so we’ll see you all later!”

She grabbed David’s hand and dragged him from the room, leaving Ginny to restrain the struggling Etta.

“We’ll go to Ravenclaw next,” Amy said, “although I’m dreading what Elly will do to you…”

“Perhaps we should miss that one out…” David replied nervously.

“That might be a good idea…” Marie said.

“In fact, I’m a little tired, is there somewhere I can take a nap?”

“My bed!” Came a faint cry from behind them, and Amy glanced back to see Etta struggling from the confines of Ginny’s arms, then, “You can take my freedom but you cannae take my liberty!”

And then, all of a sudden, as if out of nowhere, Flissy arrived on the scene.

“I heard someone talking Scottish! Where are they?”

“It was just Etta, Flissy,” Amy explained, “but David Tennant is here, and he’s Scottish.”

“Oh,” Flissy replied, “couldn’t you have got my Gerry instead?”

“What do you mean, your Gerry?” LilyFlower, who resembled a white Lily suddenly interrupted, “he’s mine!”

Amy, Swifty and Marie were so focussed on Flissy and Lily that they didn’t see that Etta had freed herself from Ginny and was now attempting to drag David back to her room.

And there we shall leave them…at the end of another normal day at The Hogwarts Experience.

I appoligise for the bad quality - im not a very good writer lol

Mick opened his eyes….then rubbed them….then blinked….then rubbed them some more…

“I can pinch you if you want” came a voice from his side

Mick looked over to his left and couldn’t help but blink again before jumping back in alarm

“Sharon….?” Mick stuttered

“Who did you think it was?”

Mick rubbed his eyes to make sure he wasn’t dreaming. There in front of him was a slender red haired elf!

“Whats going on?” Mick stammered

Elfie frowned and shook her head.

“One of these days that bludger is going to kill you” Elfie replied laughing before walking away.

Mick stared at her open mouthed.

“Afraid we Gryffindors will beat you again this year?”

Mick span around

“What the…?”

There in front of him was a human sized duck, bouncing around at his feet wearing a Gryffindor scarf around its neck

“Ah, the waterlily hit you hard this time. You slytherins just cant dodge the bludgers can you?”

Snape gaped wide

“A waterlily has hit me?” Snape said thinking that he wasn’t that soft, but yet this…duck was telling him that a waterlily had hit him.

The duck laughed, or rather quacked loudly

“Poor poor mick” she said before waddling out of the door and jumping into a pond

“oi ducky, watch it!”

Mick gulped. He was going mad, he was sure of it. A green water-lily just told the duck off for jumping on it!

Mick wiped his forehead before turning around to be nearly knocked over by a swift movement.

“sorry mick” came the voice as the blurry figure ran straight out of the door.

“Don’t mind her, she is always swiftly running after David Tennant” came a voice behind him. Mick span around yet again to see a black and green cat with a witches hat on its head and a huge pillow the size of a young girl.

“I…I…” Mick stammered before making an excuse and quickly running out of the door and straight into…

“Hi oh mighty head of house”

Mick breathed a sigh of relief. This person looked…normal.

“Who are you?” He asked as he caught his breath

The boy shook his head

“Oh Mick…we really need to sort out your defence moves in quidditch. You know I think the best tactics are……………………………….[an hour later (lol sorry Jesse)]…………………………….so yes, well I have to go, I have a meeting with a dark angel before having lunch with mcfly………………[another 15 minutes later]………….see you then”

“Hold on….Mcfly is playing here?” Mick asked before muttering “wherever this mad house is”

The boy laughed and walked through the castle doors. Snape turned around and suddenly jumped as a loud squeak came from beneath his feet. He jumped back and looked down

“Careful where you are walking Mick”

“Yes don’t mind us!”

Snape took a step back in disbelief. A lily…and a…rose…actual flowers were…talking to him.

“Sorry” he mumbled before hurrying down the grass, nearly getting knocked over by a white beetle car.

“Sorry Mick” The car said laughing

“Who…?”

“Ah, the bludgers again” the car answered knowingly, “Im Herbie remember”

Mick watched the car take out a banana and stuff it in its boot.

“Herbie…? As in Herbie from the films? Herbie goes bananas and Herbie goes to Monte Carlo?”

The car laughed

“Nope, Im just going to class”

Mick watched as the car threw the banana peel on the floor and zoomed towards the castle.

Sitting down on the bank, he watched as a girl with feather arms ran past followed by some naked doctor and an extremely fast runner, followed by the bouncing duck who had a lilly upon her back, a cheetah with a pie in its mouth, followed by a young girl running after the boy who could talk for his country, followed by the pillow human and a rose and pansy dragging their…stems…through the mud…A wizard with a long beard…the elf with pointy ears…a ‘ickle giggling baby pulling the talking water lily behind her…

“Ive gone insane” He muttered

“Join the club” said a girl with red hair beside him

“Well at least you are normal” Mick answered

Marie smiled and patted him on the back before walking into the distance with her one thousand children, including…….

“Purple hippos!”

Ravenclaw Tour in the Hogwarts Experience


Skyla walked up to the headmistresses office and tapped on the purple door. It was opened straight away by a small elf with purple and red hair.

“Thank you for coming skyla” The elf said, “we have a new person, HermioneFan and I would like you to show her around Ravenclaw house.”

A small first year peered out from behind the elf as skyla smiled

“Sure” she said as she took hermionefan by the hand and led her down the corridor towards ravenclaw house

“quadwizard” she muttered as the door swung open, “welcome to ravenclaw house”

She turned left and opened a small door leading to a room that had been bewitched to look like outside. Skyla waved to Elly who was flying in the air practicing her quidditch moves.

“That’s one of our heads of house” skyla said to hermionefan

“one?” Hermione squeaked

“Yes one” skyla replied, “let me introduce you to our other head of house”

Skyla turned around and led her into a small office. Hermionefan looked around.

“Hermionefan, this is lilyflower”

Hermionefan gasped. Behind the desk was a real life flower sitting in a pot, her arms going through paperwork. Skyla giggled and walked over to the lily flower.

“would you like some water lily?” skyla asked before filling up a jug of water and tipping it in the pot in which lilyflower stood. Lily frowned as skyla giggled and quickly led the new girl out of the office.

“Is she really a flower?” hermionefan asked, her face pale

“nah” skyla replied, “her name is lilyflower and some slytherins decided to play a prank on her and changed her into the flower. Unfortunately we haven’t been able to reverse it yet”

Suddenly someone skated into them, knocking into hermionefan.

“Hi skatinglils” skyla said as she watched hermionefan look down at skatinglils feet where instead of feet there were two skates.

“Hi skyla” lils sais as she started checking hermionefan’s jumper, trousers, hat, her neck….

“What are you doing?” Hermionefan squealed

“Riddles” lills answered, “I need to find the riddles…” and with that she ran out of the portrait hole mumbling about riddles and more riddles. Hermionefan looked at skyla

“Quadwizard” skyla said laughing as she led hermionefan past the huge ravenclaw noticeboard and into the common room. It was a few seconds before skyla realized that hermionefan had stopped by the door, her mouth hanging open.

“Whats wrong?” skyla asked

Hermionefan simply pointed, unable to speak.

Skyla looked around the room. She saw Lifey lecturing some newbies about the meaning of life and its answer of 42, A little gnome dressed in a flowing dress pouring water over a new first year, Cocoa, phoenix song sitting on the window ledge singing at the top of her voice, feathers sprouting from her arms and legs, as she pecked at some herbs which cried out that they were human and a professor.

Skyla turned back towards hermnionefan who seemed to have gone into shock, her hands clasped around half a banana and half a kiwi, ready to eat it…

“No!!!” skyla shouted and grabbed the fruit from the new girl

“What…….?”

“That’s bananakiwi” skyla said as she put her fellow ravenclaw onto the floor and watched her as she stormed into the corner muttering that she wasn’t food.

Hermionefan backed into a corner, her eyes wide.

“Whats wrong?” Skyla said innocently as a butterfly landed on her nose and kissed it, and a worm slithered by crying.

Hermionefan fell down the wall before pointing around the room

“What…what…?” she stammered before running out screaming

Skyla looked confused

“Some people are just too weird” uttered a revolving planet with legs and arms

Skyla nodded and shrugged her shoulders before settling down to a conversation with a chocolate bar…

(Here's mine lol not as great but still you might get a giggle out of it) :D ::purr::

Just another day at the Hogwarts Experience

A cute little black furball wearing a witches hat padded down the hallway purring contently. "What a lovely day to go for a stroll here." But no sooner had she said that then she was suddenly stepped on by a giant yellow duck person. "Owwie!" Kitty mewed.
"Kitty!! Oh I'm sorry about that!" Ducky said feeling bad as she picked Kitty up.

"Ducky! Shame on you! No stepping on Kitty." Elfie said rushing out and giving kitty a hug.
Ducky looked down. "I'm sorry."
"Did you step on Kitty again!?" shrieked running swift as she swiftly ran over and also huggled Kitty. "Hi Kitty, how are you?"
"Oh, I'm okay" Kitty replied.
"That's good, so have you updated your story yet?" swifty asked hopefuly.
"Actually, yes I did.I updated chapters 97-98 this morning."
"Yaaay!" And swifty dashed off to read.

Suddenly there was a giggling noise and Kitty, Elfie, and Ducky saw skuldandy being chased by characters from the anime Naruto.

No sooner had that happened when suddenly romance lover (roma) came rushing down. "Wytchy!!!!!!!!!! Did you update yet? You're killing me with not updating for soooo long like I am on pins and needles here and ..." she stopped and looked around. "Where's my Jesse? I need to tell him something!"
Kitty blinked.
"Sup Jess, here I am baby." Jesse's arrogant voice sounded from around the corner and he came strutting down the hallway. Though he didn't make it very far because roma had jumped in his arms and was hugging and kissing him.

"Aw they are so cute." squeaked Mcfly who had arrived with her and ducky's sister rip.
Rip wrinkled her nose then looked at ducky. "You really should do something about your feet.That's like the 5th time this week you stepped on someone."
"Yes, I must agree." Elfie agreed. "After all you don't want to step on David Tennant do you?"
"Noooo!!" cried ducky.

"KITTY!!!!!!" shouted a familiar voice.
Kitty was was now on the floor again looked up and saw a giant Lilyflower running towards her."Sissy!!!!!!!!!" she pounced and huggled the Lilyflower and giggled.

"Get back here you little pain in the behind!" Etta shouted waving a broom as she was chasing after Candy-who was wearing a giant red cap on her head."I told you No Capps!! Especially in the chat room!!"

"EEEEEK!!!" Candy squealed as she ran by.
Etta ran after her.
Then a string of japanese could be heard as Peteoftheworld came running down an opposite corridor. "I am out of Rice!!!" He shouted in horror as he hurried towards the kitchen.
Blondie happened to be coming down the hallway when suddenly there was a loud scream and Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy, Blaise Zabini, and Oliver wood came running out with ripped clothes and a rush of fan girls. "Oh no you don't Harry's MINE!" JustGinny screamed as she chased the fan girls with a blow torch.
"Ginny, be careful about setting fires." Elfie called out.
"Okay Elfie!!" Ginny called back as she continued her chase.
Just then Snape strode up. "I have just finished posting up more things in the Slytherin House that would be entertaining." He said to kitty who nodded.
"Sounds great, I will go see." And Kitty started towards the Slytherin common room.
"Hi Kitty" said Pansy who was a slytherin member too.
"Pansy!" Kitty said huggling her. "It's been a long time."
"Yes it has. Well I am going to go make sure Etta didn't beat Candy too much with her broom." Pansy said and left.
Flisan happened to be walking along when she saw Kitty.
"Hi Kitty how are you?"
"I'm good. Just another day here at the Hogwarts Experience, I see."

"Yes it is." Elana said as she and Lifey walked over.
"It's good that you're our new Transfiguration teacher. Congrats." Kitty said to Lifey.
"Thanks. I will do my best." Lifey said.

Just then Jennifer williams and Waterlily appeared.
"I do more work than you do." Waterlily bragged.
"I do a lot too." Jennifer said.
Then they both laughed.
"Well I do a lot of work for Slytherin." claimed pillowloverchick walking up to them.
"So do I, though I haven't been here very long." Raistlin the Wizard announced.

"Okay everyone, let's all go to the chatroom and let Elfie start a trivia game there." Ducky announced.
"Yaaaaaaaay let's go" MarieC said rushing up. "I hope there's some questions about Remus and Tonks today."
But as everyone got into the chat they heard a familiar voice
"Yes and so being the most handsome devilishly charming guy that I am, I flew after the snitch and it was hard work and then....." Everyone knew that that arrogant voice belonged to Fated4HP(Jesse). He was already giving a speech and telling tales of his great snitch catching days to roma who was ooing and awing over his ever word (LOL sorry it's just what i was imagining)
When Jesse saw Elfie and everyone had arrived, he shouted "ELFMEISSSSSTER"
"Hello to you too, Fatey" Elfie giggled.
"You never cease to amaze me, Fated." Snape said rather proudly.
"Snape, this is your fault now that Jesse has all these new titles we need to have a room just to put his ego in." Kitty laughed.
Snaped laughed too.
"Alright, let's begin." Elfie said happily.
And with that everyone enjoyed a nice game of trivia.

It was just another day at the Hogwarts Express.

The true hogwarts experiance
-------------------------------------------------------
Traci was walking the halls looking for the chat room she always manages to get lost.

She walked into one room to find Jess and Jesse arguing over something. "we are done" jesse said
'Fine with me" jess yelled. 10 quit minutes later
"I'm sorry can we be together again." Jess pleided
"wow i almost got worried there Of course." Jesse said. Traci rolled her eyes and walked on. She enteted the gryffindore common room.
"Romione" someone yelled
"Hinny"someone else yelled
"Harmony"Amber yelled
"NO Dramione" Traci yelled before walking out with a smile on her face. She walked on and finally found the chat, only to be tacklehuggeled to the ground by her sister Ginny. "Hey are ya sis."she asked
"Fine how about you?" Ginny replied.
"I'm good to. Hi Elfie"Traci yelled.
"Hey Traci are ya having fun"Elfie asked.
"You know it"she replied. It went on and on forever but finally Traci walked out to the general common room. You never know what you can find there, and what a site it was. Ginny and Charmed_Granger were arguing while burning the other ones ships. Amber was in the corner mumbling about not playing games and how the gryffindors have slacked off. Jesse was talking to R about how great of a death eater he is and how hot he is and blah blah blah. That is a day in the true Hogwarts experiance.

(i know it's not that good or long but i had to try :D )

(Since i lost my long he story that i am sad about- i am trying to rewrite it from memory and so hope it's good anyway here it is)

Hogwarts Experience-Chapter 1: Hippo-warts

"Sharon!" Mick came running in early in the morning.
"Yes?" elfie looked up from her desk seeing her beloved husband looking rather disgruntled.
"Dear, the hippo was in my classroom again, guzzling the many ingredients that I worked hard to get together for my Potion's class. Now the infernal beast is running loose through the halls and who knows where she went."
"Well go tell our son to take care of it. After all he's head boy and very good with hippo. Surely, he can get her back to her room." Elfie replied calmly.
Snape nodded and turned and strode out just as amy in a large yellow duck outfit came waddling in.
"Everything okay, sharon?" she asked.
"Oh yes, just hippo is being a bit troublesome." Elfie said.
"Oh." amy nodded then smiled. "Well, perhaps your son can handle it. Oh sharon, I have a brilliant idea for the third task."
The door closed as the Headmistress and Deputy headmistress continued their conversation in private.

Jesse the devilishly-handsome charming Head Boy was strolling down the hall, twirling his wand proudly as his badge gleamed and sparkled having been polished properly for a good three hours. As he walked a long he gave a nod and watched the girls oogle at him as he passed by. It was certainly starting off as a good morning.

"There you are!" Jesse barely had time to turn around when he was tackled and kissed by Jess. After blinking a few times and recovering from her powerfully distractive kiss, he got back up and brushed himself off. "Good to see you too, jess." he grinned.

"I'm off to cheerleading now. I'll see you later!" Jess giggled.
"Okay baby." Jesse replied as he peeled jess off of him.
She then kissed him and skipped off happily down the hall.

"Jesse, I am feeling a lot better now. Thanks for the skater magazines." Shawn said as he and Snowy walked by chatting.

Jesse smiled but then heard foot steps.

Suddenly, he felt someone whack him and he turned seeing swifters the lovely little house elf standing there.
"Swifters, did you finish cleaning my room?" He asked.
"Oh yes sir, swifty was most glad to clean your room, sir."
"Good." Jesse said proudly. "Now, go help Flissy feed the new dragons and don't let yourself get eaten cuz you need to teach your muggle studies class."
Swifters whacked Jesse. "Making me a house elf again why I'm gonna ..." she grumbled.
"Awww but swifters I wanted to make you a house elf. You can still whack me."
"Well good because I WILL keep whacking you for making me into a house elf." and she then stomped off grumbling about having to be a house elf in this story.

"Jesse, how's my favorite chief Death Eater?" Raist said as he strode up proudly.
"Doing quite well, and ready to beat Ravenclaw in Quidditch."
"I know Slytherin is going to rock! We're already in the lead with housepoints."
"Yeah I know. We've got some good active members this year." Jesse replied.
"Yeah we have to keep it up, well I'm off to the loo." And Raist left.

"I think you're biting off more than you can chew." said a voice from behind.
Jesse turned and saw a pink polkadotted Lilyflower with blond hair and bright pink eyes sitting in a large flower pot.
"Ahhh hello Lilykins." he grinned.
"I assume you will have my Ancient Runes hw done soon?"
"I'll try." he said sheepishly as he pulled out a watering can and watered Lily.
"Mmhmm." she replied with a smirk.
"What? I will.It's just with me being so important around here..." Before Jesse could finish his bragging a voice called to him.
"Jesse! Oh there you are." Mick came walking up to him rather quickly.
"Oh hey Mick. Did you see my new Quidditch plays? I have a dozen ideas-"
"Yeah I did but-"
"And I even got our new Quidditch robes for the season also I have 5 new plays that I can't wait to show the team. I have this one move where..." Jesse continued on for a good fifteen minutes before Mick finally had to cut in.
"Yes yes yes and you are a great captain but my concern deals with Hippo."
"H-Hippo?" Jesse asked raising a brow.
"Yes, she's running about getting into things. Some how she must have got out of her room, though I'm quite sure I closed the door." Mick pondered.
Jesse blinked then cleared his throat.
"Oh yeah..." Jesse remembered he'd forgotten to close the door when he'd fed her but it was probably best not to tell Mick that. After all the Potion's Professor had a lot to do and needn't be bothered with tiny details as that.
"So, since you are our Head Boy and you are good with Hippo, Elfie and I felt you'd be perfect for the job of getting her back to her room."
"Oh no problem. Glad to!" Jesse said proudly.
Mick smiled. "I knew we could count on you. Well I'm off to teach, see you later." And he walked away.
Jesse straightened his Head Boy badge and started off down the hall. And then he felt something land on the side of his cheek. It was the head girl, Mcfly.
"Eww Elly! Get off my face!" He grumbled swatting her off.
She buzzed over in front of him and frowned. "It's my animagus but...I don't know how to change back that's why I'm going to find Lifey to help me since she is the transfiguration teacher." And she flew off.

Jesse continued on his happy way down the hall then heard some giggling and kissing sounds. Rolling his eyes he found Adam and Ginny liplocked.
"Oh come on you two, this is the 10th time I've caught you guys here. Really, go do that in the library or something."
"Ohhhh no, not in MY library." Roman said as he walked up in a toga and sandals. "Now I'm off to find my queen. Hopefully she hasn't done another 20 essays." he mumbled walking off down the hall.

"Jesse, did you leave the Hippo's door open again?" asked Ginny as she pulled away from the dazed goofy looking Adam.
Jesse glared but then rolled his eyes. "Honestly, you think I would do that? Pfft."

Elana and skully were busy talking with jenn when Jesse walked into the Great Hall.
"Hey girls." he said to them.

Just then Hippo came rushing down the hall.

"GAHHHHH!" Hippo plowed into Jesse knocking him down and it was only when she was that close that he realized that Hippo smelled VERY VERY Bad.

"Ewwwwwwwwww!" Elana said covering her nose.
"what's that smell?" asked skully.
"It's making me sick." Jenn added.

Jesse gagged too. "Hippo is covered in dungbombs. She needs a bath." He said.

"Well go give her one." Amber said covering her nose as she walked out of the games room.
"I will but I-" Before Jesse could finish there came a loud yell.
"AGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOT GORDON!" Cheery came whining. "I saw the race and Jeff Gordon beat Kasey Kahne! NO!!!!!!!!!!"

"What!! " Jesse gasped in horror.
All of the yelling scared and upset poor hippo and suddenly she lost control of her bladder right onto Jesse's foot.

"Ewwwwww" came several voice and Jesse groaned.

"Ugh...guess Hippo needs a bath." He groaned, dreading that.

"Hippo's not the only one." said Marie walking up wrinkling her nose.

Jesse sighed. He knew in the next chapter,he was going to have to give Hippo a bath.

(I didnt get to mention many of yu, but please dont get offended)

When she got her letter she figured the Hogwarts Experience would be exactly like Hogwarts. That it was like a twin school that worked in the exact same way. How wrong she was. She should’ve figured it was different just by the first day.

***

I had just walked in to the new school. It was sparkling clean, and looked wonderful. I smiled happily. This seemed great. I was about to walk into the Great Hall when the Headmistress greeted me. She had slightly pointed ears, and was quite tall. She cheerfully grabbed me and led me along. She pointed to a door where I was supposed to get sorted. I nodded, and she then pushed me into a room opposite of it yelling for me to introduce myself. I was met with a chair in which I was supposed to sit.

I hesitantly sat in it not knowing what to expect. I heard some scratching outside the door, and I got frightened and yelled, “Who’s out there?”

“Its just Elfie. I’m putting a green arrow on the door, to show that there is a newcomer to greet,”

“Okay…” So then I waited. I tapped my fingers, and whistled to myself until finally someone came in.

“Welcome! I’m Elly, Head Girl! You’ll be sorted soon you know. I hope you’re in Ravenclaw. Were the best!” And before I could say anything back she ran out of the door. This time I’ll be prepared I told myself. Then a guy walked in.

“Hello I’m Jesse, I’m devilishly handsome, and amazing. I’m Hogwarts number one Death Eater, Head Boy, and loved by all. Pleased to meet you. PM the mods, and remember to do your homework,” Then he walked out the door and as soon as he opened the door I saw 10 people grab his legs squeeing. As the door closed I saw him walk away dragging his fans with him. I was left mystified. As I thought about it, I tried my best to make sense of it.

The longer I stayed in that room the more sense it made… but then again I didn’t have any food or water in the room. But that’s not the point! Eventually however Elfie came back in grabbed my arm and tugged me to the Sorting Area.

“Finally you’ll get sorted today! Then you can go roam around after that, okay?” I nodded, my eyes really blurred. I ended up getting sorted in Hufflepuff. That’s when I started to explore.

It all seemed so normal at first. I saw where I could do homework to rack up points. It seemed so real. Then I saw a door that said “Games Galore,” I figured it must be fun so I walked inside. Noises filled the air. I saw one girl I knew. She walked around her eyes glazed.

“Amber?” I asked.

“Cheetah?” She looked at me. Her eyes are getting a tad red, and her left eye was twitching slightly. Her hair looked as if it hadn’t been brushed in days. Her clothes had duck tape on every side, but it seemed to be torn up.

“You need to get home Amber. Get some sleep, the games will be here tomorrow,” I tried to explain.

“NOOO!!! GAMES RULE THE WORLD!! Never leave… They made me. No. Duck tape couldn’t stop them. I got back though. Heh heh. Haven’t slept in three days. Funny.” She said not speaking in coherent sentences, but out of nowhere her eyes seemed to straighten and she smiled at me. “Fortunately he walked out. Unfortunately he was tired. No I don’t like asparagus. Tpbm is in love with Harmione. Why must you insist on asking me questions? Didn’t you know? Huh? HUH???” She then ran around the room screaming at people. They didn’t seem to mind however and yelled right back. I have to admit it scared me.

“I’m- Uh I’m going to leave now,” As I left I heard Amber.

“Cheetah isn’t a cheetah at all! She’s an antelope I tell you! ANTELOPE!”

I ran as fast as I could into the first thing I could find. Hogwarts Walks. I shut the door to find people running around, a couple skipping and others in heated debates.

“Hansy! It’s the best ship around!” Someone called.

“Pansy! Hansy is so UNBELIEVABLE! Hinny is the most wonderful, beautiful CANON ship!”

“Ginny is evil!”

“Drinny all the way!”

Then someone ran into me. They got up and I saw their red hair dangle in front of them.

“Hi, I’m Ginny, Just Ginny.” She said shaking my hand. “I see you found Hogwarts Walks,” She then was put off track by a noise. I couldn’t hear it, but she sure could. “HINNY IS NOT STUPID!” She yelled looking at someone.

“Glaise forever!” A group shouted back holding up doughnuts.

“Show me a good fanfic!” She shouted back. “But even if you DID, Hinny still rocks,” She then walked off. As I walked on I saw the Romione topic. I wrinkled my nose and walked up to it. That is until I saw someone. She was about as crazy as Amber was when I saw her in the Games room. She had a paper hat on that listed all the classes on it with hearts everywhere, and she held a broom.

“Hey you!” She called out to me. I looked up. “Have you done any homework?” She asked holding the broom higher as if ready to swing.

“Er, yes, but I’m new so I haven’t done much yet.” I stuttered. Her scowl quickly became a bright grin.

“Sorry if I scared you. Homework is needed. Tee he!” She giggled. “Anyway your new? Make sure to do your homework. Sorry if I do get scary. Part of my job. Remember I love you all!” She then walked off until she saw another Hufflepuff walking around aimlessly. Her face immediately grew dark. She hit them in the butt with her broom, and batted them into doing homework. Afterwards she smiled kindly and skipped away.

I walked silently out of the Hogwarts Walks and decided to go to Hogwarts Community. The first thing I noticed when I came in was the laid back sense. Everyone was laughing and messing around, sharing pictures, and ideas. I smiled. Only one person wasn’t running around having fun. It said Swift on the back of their shirt.

“Hippos,” They muttered. “Always got to clean up after them,” She then spotted me. I tried to get away, because I saw a weird sparkle in her eyes, but she grabbed my by the shoulders. “Hope it’s not too dirty here! I mean… it doesn’t look dirty does it? Cluttered? Oh my gosh! What is someone is claustrophobic? I must clean that up!” They ran off forgetting I was there. So then I talked with everyone.

“I’m so ugly in these pictures Cookie,” Someone was saying.

“No you don’t! You’re beautiful! Right Skully?” She asked poking Skully. Skully nodded.

“Your all beautiful!” Skully said.

“Hooray! In our own special way!” They chanted.

Then the hippos came. They rampaged and crashed through everyone. I thought people were going to get angry with them for ruining everything, but instead they cheered and hugged each hippo they laid a hand on.

So I looked at this school and I was amazed. It was so different than I could have ever imagined. I mean who would have thought? You might think that I’d leave this school, declare it was insane and run home to my mother. Maybe it was from the lack of sleep, or too much chocolate, (“CHOCOLATES BAD!” Algie screams.) But I fell in love with this place and never left.