RAVENCLAW: Fashion Police

Only Ravenclaw Fashion Police group may post here. This is one of three categories up this week.

This category will be open from Saturday 24th March 2007 to Saturday 31st March 2007 before the next categories open.

You will be marked closely on the following;

Costumes and descriptions
The RPG Catwalk show as a whole
Music, set design, lighting and other behind the scenes
Other information
Individual Performance and Group work


Good luck and have fun!

Fashion Police

Description:
Announcer: Ravenclaw's very own Rigby Dumbledore went deep into the trunks and wardrobes of her house's worst fashion offenders, who shall remain nameless, to uncover the don'ts of this upcoming season. Or any season, ever. First up we have Molly, in colors that never should be worn together or seperatly. This outfit was found in a first years wardrobe, and will be promptly burned after the show. The top is a throw back to the 80's in all the wrong ways, with a high belt cinched just below the bust, and then for reasons unknown a second chain belt around the hips. The first year swears it came with both belts. The color is best known for being found in the bottom of diapers, and is unflattering in the extreme. Next our Ravenclaw fashion disaster teamed the 80's top with the day-glo colors of the early 90's. Lycra short pants and matching Jackson gloves. While the pants and gloves do show some functionality for night joggers, they should not be forced upon people's eyesight in the daytime. The next don't is the green and black knee highs. Knee highs by themselves do not rate a fashion don't, but you do want to avoid looking like the wicked witch of the east's legs. The shoes are slip-ons that should only be worn around the house, not paired with knee highs, or lycra pants. The outfit is over accessorized as well, the necklace overwhelms the top, and her ears look like they are being attacked by small birds. This new season in all about the thin headband, so say goodbye to thick, patterned bands. Overall, unless you want to go back to when we were burned by the stake, avoid being seen in public in any of these items. You will cause panic among Muggles.

Price:
The outfit is not for sale, but we are accepting donations for St. Mungo's, to help all the people who have been physically hurt by bad fashion. If you are one of our lucky top donators you will get the chance to set this outfit on fire. See our main tent for details.

RPG Catwalk:
Molly tried not to cry as Rigby placed the headband in her stiff, pointy hair. "Calm down, no one will know the outfit belongs to you, unless you keep blubbering!" said Rigby. Molly nodded her head in understanding, and noisly gulped down her sobs. She knew she didn't have great taste in clothes, but she had really thought that all the shades of green had brought out her best feature, her bright red hair. Rigby had disabused her of that idea when she had forced Molly to look at a picture of her actually wearing the outfit. It had hurt her eyes a little.

"Okay, I'm going to pass out the sunglasses to the audience so that no one gets blinded when the light hits your day-glo lycra. I want you to go out there and have fun! Pretend you are someone else, in someone else's horrible clothes. Just listen to the music, and remember, you are helping people. Let them know that there is help for the fashion impaired, okay?"asked Rigby.

Molly nodded again, still not trusting her voice. She did feel better. She had gone shopping with Elana the day before and wasn't getting help for her problem. Soon, she would develop her own sense of fashion, she just had to work at it. Starting to smile she gave Rigby the thumbs up sign and took her place behind the curtain... well where the curtains should be, they had been replaced with bars, looking like a set out of Chicago. While waiting for her music cue she watched Rigby passing out the sunglasses. She heard some whispers behind her, and she cringed, knowing they were talking about her. Realizing that she was slouching, she suddenly stood up straight, that was her music cue!

She hit the runway with purpose, keeping Rigby's words in mind. She posed while the announcer tore her outfits to pieces with his caustic words, but she played in up, pretending to be shocked to find herself dressed in such bad clothes. Soon the audience was laughing not at her, but with her. Molly took long, graceful steps down the runway. On her way back , she paused midway. Turning, she slowly took off her belt around the waist and let it drop disdainfullly to the ground, the audience clapping. Slowly she made her way backstage, pausing now and then to hurl a glove or earring to the ground, causing the audience to burst with laughter. Finally she tore off her huge headband and threw it into the audience, noticing that Rigby was quick to run and catch it. She must want it for the bonfire, thought Molly. Before she could make her escape from the catwalk she was stopped by faux fashion police, whe handcuffed her and read her the rights.

"You have the right to remain clothed. Any wardrobe items that are deemed bad fashion or offensive will be replaced. You have the right to a personal stylist, if you cannot afford one, one will be offered to you at no cost. Do you understand your rights as I have read them to you?" asked one of the officers- one who suspiciously looked like Lily.

"Does it look like I understand fashion?" Molly asked brazenly.

She was led away from the runway to thunderous applause, and collapsed into one of the comfy chairs that Lily had conjured for the models to relax in.
"Okay, ready for the blowtorch!" she yelled. The rest of the Fashion Police models burst out into laughter. Molly smiled, glad that she was finally in on the joke for once.

Catwalk Music:
She's Got the Look by Roxette

Walking like a man, hitting like a hammer, she's a juvenile scam.
Never was a quitter, tasty like a raindrop,
she's got the look.
Heavenly bound cause heaven's got a number when she's spinning me around,
kissing is a colour. Her loving is a wild dog,


she's got the look.

She's got the look.
She's got the look.
What in the world can make a brown-eyed girl turn blue.
When everything I'll ever do I'll do for you
and I go: la la la la la she's got the look.

Fire in the ice naked to the t-bone is a lover's disguise.
Banging on the head drum, shaking like a mad bull,
she's got the look.

Swaying to the band, moving like a hammer she's a miracle man.
Loving is the ocean, kissing is the wet sand,
she's got the look.

And she goes: na na na na na na na na.


Description:
Announcer: Next up we have brave Stacia modeling Bohemia gone wrong. The plain white top just hangs on her, it has no form and no style and no place on a catwalk. Her skirt is a throw back to the hippie days, but honestly it looks like a picnic blanket was killed to make it. The sandals, with their complicated wrap style is so 3 seasons ago, and it has long since worn out its welcome. Please ladies, purge it from your closet! To top it off, literally, Stacia is wearing her beautiful raven hair in a hideous blue scrunchie! I know that ponytails are quick and easy, but scrunchies are an eyesore that will no longer be tolerated. And if you do insist on keeping them, do not, I repeat, DO NOT use them as bracelets! Look, ladies and gentlemen, but do not copy!

Price:
Item not for sale, donations will be accepted for St. Mungo's to help assist those who have been harmed by bad fashion. Dig deep in your pockets, it's for a good cause!

RPG Catwalk:
Stacia watched as Molly took the stage, worrying about her own catwalk. At least Molly's outfit was humorous, her's was just sad. I look like I don't shave my legs, she thought. Stacia liked order and neatness, her body rebeled against clothing that was so loose and useless. Rigby had yelled at her to stop being such a baby, but Stacia was sure she was allergic to the bad fashion, she was itchy. She laughed as she saw Molly being "arrested" by the Fahion Police. She suddenly could not wait for her turn. She was laughing so hard that she missed her music cue and was shoved onstage by the model behind her.

She froze for a moment, not use to being seen by so many people at once. She remembered to pose as the announcer began detailing her outfit. Stacia might not look her best, but she ws going to work it. Starting her walk, she put on a nonchalant attitude, pretending that she was modeling high fashion for people with no shape. She twirled, and whipped her schruncied ponytail around with ferocity. The audience didn't laugh, but they clapped. Stacia soon had the audience on their feet, singing along with the chorus of her song, as she herself prowled the catwalk haughtily. The outfit was not going on sale, but she wanted to get as many donations for St. Muno's.

When the fashion police came to arrest her they took her scrunchie out of her hair, twisting it to fashion a pair of handcuffs. This time the audience did laugh. Stacia laughed as well, the red and blue police lights reflecting of her shiny, unbound hair. She was escorted offstage by the "officers" and perched on the elbow of Molly's overstuffed chair. Molly took a look at her scrunchied hands and burst out with laughter, untli Rigby came to usher them to thier dressing area. Waiting for them were some of the outfits that were going to be featured in Ravenclaw Wear. The girls excitedly put on the new clothes while Rigby gathered up their fahsion no-no's to take to the main tent. Stacia and Molly stayed behind to help their fellow fashion victim models.

Catwalk Music:
World Shut Your Mouth by Julian Cope

She sings 'World, shut your mouth, shut your mouth
Put your head back in the clouds and shut your mouth
World, shut your mouth, shut your mouth
Put your head back in the clouds and shut your mouth'

She always used to live so secretly
She'd be seen in and out of the sound
She's taking on the role of the four winds now
She's having tea there out in the crowd
She's flying in the face of fashion now
She seems to have a will of her own
In lieu of what you're saying so frequently
She seems to have, it all adds up

She sings 'World, shut your mouth, shut your mouth
Put your head back in the clouds and shut your mouth
World, shut your mouth, shut your mouth
Put your head back in the clouds and shut your mouth'

She sings 'World, shut your mouth, shut your mouth
Put your head back in the clouds and shut your mouth
World, shut your mouth, shut your mouth
Put your head back in the clouds and shut your mouth'

She sings 'World, shut your mouth, shut your mouth
Put your head back in the clouds and shut your mouth
World, shut your mouth, shut your mouth
Put your head back in the clouds and shut your mouth'

'World, shut your mouth, shut your mouth
Put your head back in the clouds and shut your mouth
World, shut your mouth, shut your mouth
Put your head back in the clouds and shut your mouth'

LilyFlower's Fashion Police

Description:
Announcer: Our next offender comes straight from Lily's Worst Dressed of 2007 list, Jessica, step on out! Ravenclaw's social butterfly took the meaning too literally! Her faux fairy wings should be kept to halloween or medieval fairs, definently not every day wear. Ghastly! Her plaid pants are cut as bell bottoms, which do not flatter any man or woman's figure. Jessica is also sporting a cropped tank that shows far more than it hides. Honestly, Jessica, do your parents know you own this top? I implore you, ladies and gentlemen, to learn from this tragic girl's mistakes!

Price:
This outfit is not fit for sale, but again you can make donations to St. Mungo's Hospital for help with those injured by awful fashion such as this!

RPG Catwalk:

Jessica shifted uncomfortably under the glare of Rigby's appraisal.
"Honestly, Jess, how old are you? 15? If you don't stop dressing like a...well, like Britney Spears, then you're going to end up like...well like Britney Spears!" Rigby admonished. Jessica smiled blankly at her, not quite sure she knew what Rigby meant. Rigby shook her head, threw her arms up, and walked away. Jess was unconcerned, Lily had been frustated with her as well, but had beat the runway routine in to her head. She made her way to the entrance of the catwalk, waiting for the annoucer to call her name.

When she heard her name called she took her place on stage, flirting with the audience and just looking overall cutely at everyone. She bashfully tugged on her wings, oblivious to the announcer's harsh words. Jessica wasn't sure what kind of catagory Fashion Police was, but the bars looked kind of scary! She shivered, but recovered when the music began. Owww! She loved this song! She took off down the runway, bopping along like she was listening to her ipod alone in her room. The audience cheered and laughed at her, and Jessica paused now and then to pose, and sometimes to wave at one of her friends-even though Lily had not advised her on that.

Jessica reached the end of the runway and twirled so fiercely that she got dizzy, and she ended up zig-zagging all over the stage on her backwards pass. She giggled as the announcer lept to the stage and helped her off the runway, much to the amused crowd's delight. The Fashion Police officers, one who looked suspiciously like Lily, just stood emotionless and staring out into the crowd. She continued giggling as the announcer dumped her in a empty chair and hurried back to his post. Rigby came up to her and stood, hovering. "Okay, Jess, that was...interesting. I know Lily told you to go help with the donations, but I think you've worked hard enough today, and I think Lily would agree that you should just stay here until the after party starts, Ok?" Jess tried to give an answer, but Rigby just looked so silly! Trying to be all serious, it was just too much! Jessica finally managed a nod, not noticing that Rigby had signaled for one of the first years to sit with her. Jessica stopped giggling as she finally realized that she'd have to wait until the entire event was over before she could move. The first year boy had his wand raised and ready... to use on her!

Catwalk Music:
Sweet Escape by Gwen Stefani

If I could escape I would but,
First of all, let me say
I must apologize for acting stank & treating you this way
Cause I've been acting like sour milk all on the floor
It's your fault you didn't shut the refrigerator
Maybe that's the reason I've been acting so cold?

[CHORUS]
If I could escape & recreate a place that's my own world
& I could be your favourite girl (forever), Perfectly together
Tell me boy now wouldn't that be sweet? (sweet escape)
If I could be sweet, I know I've been a real bad girl (I'll try to change)
I didn't mean for you to get hurt (whatsoever)
We can make it better, Tell me boy wouldn't that be sweet? (sweet escape)

[Akon]
I want to get away, to our sweet escape
I want to get away, yeah

[Gwen]
You held me down, I'm at my lowest boiling point
Come help me out, I need to get me out of this joint
Come on let's bounce, counting on you to turn me around
Instead of clowning around, let's look for some common ground
So baby, times get a little crazy
I've been gettin' a little lazy, waitin' on you to come save me
I can see that you're angry by the way that you treat me
Hopefully you don't leave me, wanna take you with me

[CHORUS]
If I could escape & recreate a place that's my own world
& I could be your favourite girl (forever), Perfectly together
& tell me boy now wouldn't that be sweet? (sweet escape)
If I could be sweet (sorry boy)
I know I've been a real bad girl (I'll try to change)
I didn't mean for you to get hurt (whatsoever)
We can make it better
& tell me boy now wouldn't that be sweet? (sweet escape)

Woohoo, Yeehoo
Woohoo, Yeehoo (If I could escape)
Woohoo, yeehoo (If I could escape)
Woohoo, Yeehoo

Cause I've been acting like sour milk all on the floor
It's your fault you didn't shut the refrigerator
Maybe that's the reason I've been acting so cold?

[CHORUS]
If I could escape & recreate a place that's my own world
& I could be your favourite girl (forever), Perfectly together
& tell me boy now wouldn't that be sweet? (sweet escape)
If I could be sweet (sorry boy)
I know I've been a real bad girl (I'll try to change)
I didn't mean for you to get hurt (whatsoever)
We can make it better
& tell me boy now wouldn't that be sweet? (sweet escape)

Woohoo, Yeehoo (I wanna get away, get away)
Woohoo, Yeehoo (To our sweet escape)
Woohoo, Yeehoo (I wanna get away)
Woohoo, Yeehoo (Yeah)
Woohoo, Yeehoo
Woohoo, Yeehoo



Description:
Announcer: Alrighty, then, up next we have brave Briana. She wants it made clear that these clothes do not belong to her, she just has the misfortune of modeling them. First off, Briana is wearing a leotard top in in black and pink diagonal stripes. Unless you are actually in a dance studio, and all of your other leotards are dirty. then you should not wear this top. It features hideously slashed sleeves and cropped bottom. You should also be careful to stay away from any type of flames, as this in made of mostly polyester. Around her waist is a belly chain that had a brief moment of coolness, but now it's just trashy and tacky. Her jeans feature cut outs in all the wrong places, not appropriate for school, or indeed anywhere that one may be spotted by one's peers. She too is modeling the outdated scruchy, which will be burned immediatly after the show. So, if you would, please put your hands together for Briana!

Price:
Due to the highly unwearable quality of this outfit, it will not be sold or given away to the poor, however, you make give a dontaion at our main tent for St. Mungo's, who are dedicated to treating all that are damaged and scarred by fashion.

RPG Catwalk:

Briana had watched Jessica's performance, and had felt bad for the clueless girl, how she ever got sorted into Ravenclaw was a mystery to all. She had complemented Briana on her wardrobe, so it was a good idea the girl would not be able to get her hands on it. Briana was a little nervous, her bathing suit was more modest then this outfit! She was glad that her parents had been unable to make it for the weekend, she had a feeling her dad would not understand. Elana had come over from the Street Wear Tent to give her a encouraging pep talk, and Bre did feel a bit better. Ever since Lily had shown her what she was to wear she had been working out like a fiend. She was determined to look good even if she was clothed in the worst taste ever.

Finally the announcer took his place, having helped a dizzy and giggling Jessica backstage, and introduced Briana. She sent up a silent prayer and stepped out from behind the prison bars and onto the catwalk. The blue and red police lights circled crazily overhead and her music began to play. She put on her most brilliant smile and began her walk. She found that if she blocked everything out but the music and her own silent step count that she was able to move like she did this kind of thing everyday. Midway down she paused, as rehearsed, and did a series of poses that she and Lily had practiced. Finally she continued to the end of the runway where she posed and turned sharply around.

Briana kept her eyes on the Fashion Police officers. Wait? Was that Lily? No, it couldn't be, Lily was in Albany, still it looked just like her. Right before she reached the police officers, she turned and stared imploringly into the crowd, asking for a last minute reprieve. "Forgive me! I know not what I wear!" she shouted. The audience erupted in laughter, but still cried for her arrest. Faux Lily placed her under arrest and led her backstage. Rigby was waiting there with the keys to the cuffs. She gave Briana a wink as she freed her and then promptly ordered her to the merchandise tent.

Catwalk Music:
Open Toe Shoes by Katherine McPhee

I been needin' a girls night out
I got nothin' but hand-me-down's
I need a quick fix
To make these clothes hotter
No matter what it is
A girls gotta
The pedicure
White tip french
Legs don't make no sense
Not rich
But I bought a diamond anklet
Keep it on
It goes with my outfit
Hey

Hey let's go
If they're not too high
Too low
I'll take them home
In purple, red, or gold
Cuz I know them boys
They like
Those open toes

Jeans all black
<a href="http://www.lyricsmania.com">Lyrics</a>
Hair slicked back
Baseball cap
Still cute in my open toes
Mini skirt
Feet don't hurt
Just a flirt
Too cute in my open toes
Work or play
Night or day
Do my thing
Too cute in my open toes
Never too many open toes
A girl needs plenty open toes

Oh oh oh
Oh oh oh

I'm lovin' these sling-back shoes
I like the way they stay loose
I could wear them all day
And listen to the click-clack
Shoes like this make me hate flats
Swipe that card I'm good
Another pair in leather and wood
I'm a sucker for a name-brand
Skip the rack
And stick to the game plan

Hey let's go
If they're not too high
Too low
I'll take them home
(I'll take them home)
In purple, red, or gold
Cuz I know them boys
They like those open toes
Those open toes

Jeans all black
Hair slicked back
Baseball cap
Still cute in my open toes
Mini skirt
Feet don't hurt
Just a flirt
Too cute in my open toes
Work or play
Night or day
Do my thing
Too cut in my open toes
Never too many open toes
A girl needs plenty open toes

I'm feelin' down
That's when I go out
And shop till I drop
Everywhere that I want
Cuz nothing feels better
Than spending my treasure
On me
Finally
I'm where I'm sposed to be

Chorus

Put em on
Put em on
Let's go
Put em on
Put em on
Let's go
Only got one life
Feelin' good tonight
And this girls not stayin' home

Put em on
Put em on
Let's go
Put em on
Put em on
Let's go
Only got one life
Feelin' good tonight
And this girls not stayin' home
(Danger)

Fashion Police

https://2img.net/h/i149.photobucket.com/albums/s58/RigbyDumbledore/Fashnono.jpg
Description:
Our next Ravenclaw Model is Lisey, wearing a purple monstrosity not usually seen outside of Barney. The top is a baggy sweater that features a flower applique that might interest your grandmother, the purple flower skirt should only be worn school teachers, and the purple and pink sandals are just grown-up Barbie shoes, a total disaster! The light purple hat went out of style with the TV show Blossom, and was never as cool as we once thought it was.

Price: Unfit for public sale, please inquire at our main tent where we are accepting donations to St. Mungo's for victims of fashion.

RPG Catwalk:

Lisey stood in front of one of the many ornate mirrors that hung aroung backstage, glad she had opted for the highlights during her last salon visit. She practiced her runway walk, and felt that she had it down perfectly. Taking a deep breathe, she stepped onto the runway, momentarily blinded by the lights. Her eyes took in the prison bars and the crowd waiting to watch her look bad. It was kind of funny, but she was doing a good deed by illustrating what not to wear. Lisey herself was very stylish, and her outfit was against everything she believed in, but it was for Ravenclaw, which came first to her.

She walked the runway, making sure to make eye contact with the judges so she could make an impression, other that just her ugly clothes. She had personally borrowed the entire ensemble from a muggle friend of hers, and it pained her to know that this outfit had been seen in public. Lisey twirled and posed, making the best out of the situtation. The crowd was friendly and in the mood to have a good time, clapping along to the song and cheering her on.

Lisey made the final turn, now heading to where the Fashion Police were waiting. She held up her arms and yelled, "Don't shoot!" The audience roared with laughter as she was led away in handcuffs, having her fashion rights read to her. Taken back stage she was finally released from her handcuffs. She rubbed her wrists and put on a long suffering expression, making everyone backstage laugh. Lisey grinned and went to find the afterparty, she had heard that Rock N Roll models had scored some hot musician dates!


Runway Music
I'm Too Sexy by Right Said Fred

I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love
Love's going to leave me

I'm too sexy for my shirt too sexy for my shirt
So sexy it hurts
And I'm too sexy for Milan too sexy for Milan
New York and Japan

And I'm too sexy for your party
Too sexy for your party
No way I'm disco dancing

I'm a model you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah
I do my little turn on the catwalk

I'm too sexy for my car too sexy for my car
Too sexy by far
And I'm too sexy for my hat
Too sexy for my hat what do you think about that

I'm a model you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah
I shake my little touche on the catwalk

I'm too sexy for my too sexy for my too sexy for my

'Cos I'm a model you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah
I shake my little touche on the catwalk

I'm too sexy for my cat too sexy for my cat
Poor pussy poor pussy cat
I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love
Love's going to leave me

And I'm too sexy for this song